


Emotionally in Love

by LadyVelvetCPeterson



Category: Dragon Age Inquisition - Fandom
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-22
Updated: 2016-02-22
Packaged: 2018-05-22 15:32:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 23
Words: 33,915
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6085113
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyVelvetCPeterson/pseuds/LadyVelvetCPeterson
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Story based off interesting Kink meme prompt....I was interested to test my skills with it....if you have issues with Dorian's canon being messed with don't read...negativity will be moderated and deleted. Endings are separate so you can pick your choice either main ending(dorian/bull, izzy /?) or alternate(dorian/izzy)....</p><p>Prompt: So of course, on my first play through, the one character I want to romance is Dorian.I'd like to think that my F!Quizzy had fallen hard for Dorian, but obviously, her feelings weren't reciprocated.<br/>I'd like to see something sort of like this: F!Quizzy falls in love with Dorian, but keeps her mouth shut because she knows he doesn't love her because she's a girl...<br/>...Except Dorian DOES end up falling in love with her. OP can explain this however they want. I kind of see it as Dorian turning out to be bisexual, but was more sexually attracted toward men & never found a woman he had feelings for except Quizzy, but feels more emotionally attracted to her than physically. BUT, OP can do it however they want</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Broken hearts and Broken Lives

I love him this man. I realize as I hold Dorian in a tight hug as he sobs after the debacle of a meeting with his asinine father. The way my heart plummeted into my stomach at his confession but this is not the time for me to react. His father was going to use blood magic to change him…Blood magic! If he were changed he wouldn't be...well Dorian and I would have missed out on the experience of getting to know my dearest friend. Now I understand everything and the pain he has carried for long and why he left his beloved homeland. I won’t add to the weight he carries on his shoulders as he has made it clear that his interests don’t lie with the opposite sex. I make a decision as I comfort my dear sweet funny friend. I will remain his faithful friend.

Once Dorian has calmed down we sit in one of the nooks in the library. “Maker knows what you must think of me now, after that display,” Dorian says shaking his head as he uncorks the bottle of wine in his hand and offers it me. 

I take a gulp of the offered bottle while I decide how to reply. Handing it back to him I say cheekily, “I think you led me on actually.” His face drops, fen harel’s ass, I said the wrong thing.

“You are a remarkable woman, Inquisitor and I mean that in the best way. Maybe in another life…” Dorian shakes his head again and then takes a drink, “I meant no offense, I’ll desist if you prefer.”

“Desist?” I say with smirk on my face, “don’t you dare!”

He laughs his smile lighting up his face. “I stand so instructed,” He says handing me the bottle. I’m happy to make him smile. Although it will never be...his friendship will be enough.


	2. Rumors

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mother Giselle confronts Dorian about his "involvement" with Izzy.

I have spent the last week on the road as we went to that weird temple in the oasis. I am excited to see Dorian again as I had left him at Skyhold to see if he could find some clue as to where Corypheus came from. As I head upstairs to see my friend and I hear Dorian say "You'd be surprised at the credit my tongue gives me, your reverence." I blush guiltily at the naughty thoughts going through my head and after a moment of regaining my composure I enter the room.

As I enter the room the Revered Mother seems a bit shocked to see me, "oh I…" she says looking at me sheepishly.

"What's going on here?" I ask brightly giving Dorian a smile.

"It seems the Revered Mother is concerned about my "undue influence" over you." Dorian answers with a disgusted look on his face. That look pulls his features down and his moustache crinkles angrily.

"It is just concern." Mother Giselle says calmly, "Your Worship, you must know how this looks."

I cringe inwardly at the title, and school my face into blissful ignorance. Which usually works because a silly Dalish girl won't know of course.

"You may need to spell it out, my dear." Dorian says smirking at the Revered Mother.

Mother Giselle sighs, "This man is of Tevinter. His presence at your side. The rumors alone…"

"So what?" I say shrugging my shoulders, "I am a DALISH elf in case that has escaped your notice. I have no loyalty to your Andraste or your Maker, so what difference does it make if Dorian wants to help? What difference does it make that he is from Tevinter, specifically?"

Mother Giselle is quiet for a moment and starts again trying a different angle, "I am fully aware that not everyone from the Imperium is the same."

Dorian snorts, "How kind of you to notice. Yet you still bow to the opinion of the masses?"

Mother Giselle looks at him sharply, "the opinion of the masses is based on centuries of evidence. What would you have me tell them?" She crosses her arms.

"The truth?" Dorian quips smiling.

"The truth is I don't know you and neither do they. Thus these rumors will continue." She says shortly.

"There is no reason for concern we are both here to help the inquisition," I offer hoping to diffuse the situation.

"With all due respect, you underestimate the effect his man has on the people's good opinion." She explains patiently.

She may be patient but my patience with the good peoples' opinion has run out. "Do the people know how he helped the inquisition? I'd like to hear what these rumors are exactly."

She dodges the first question and answers the second, "I…could not repeat them, your worship."

I look at Dorian a wicked smile crossing my face and he grins in understanding, "Repeat them? So you shared them before?"

"I…see," Mother Giselle says sheepishly, "I meant no disrespect, Inquisitor, only to ask after the young man's intentions." She uncrosses her arms as she regains her composure once again. "If you feel he is without ulterior motive then I humbly beg forgiveness of you both." She bows slightly and walks away.

"Well that's something." Dorian says with a bit of astonishment.

"Does this sort of thing happen often?" I ask concern lacing my voice, "did she get to you?" I am half afraid he might leave.

"Yes and no," He smiles, "it happens more than anyone tells you. But it takes more than a few thinly veiled accusations to get to me. Besides no one knows their own reputation."

"Until somebody helpfully informs you," I offer with a wry smile, "You don't think she'll do anything else?"

"She meant well though, if you're worried. What would she do?" Dorian grins, "She was probably hoping I would go back to Tevinter with my father. No her opinion means nothing to me it's your good opinion I care about." His face changes to concerned as he looks down at me. "I should ask…do the rumors bother you?"

"I wish they wouldn't disparage you…they don't know you." I say honestly.

"They know you even less then they know me," He replies somberly, "I don't know if you are aware but the assumption in some corners is that you and I…are intimate."

"Everyone has an opinion," I say dryly, "However, I don't think that is worst assumption they could have is it?"

Dorian snickers, a wicked grin crosses his face and he grabs me around the waist. Swinging me up in air like I weight nothing giving me hug he spins me around. This makes me laugh giddily. Then he comes to stop and looks at me. "Perhaps it is odd to say but I think of you as a friend, inquisitor. I have precious few friends I didn't think to find one here." Dorian says in a more serious manner as he sets me down.

I can't help but to inwardly wince at his words. I hope it doesn't show as I smile at him and open my mouth to speak but he interrupts.

"Don't speak," he continues, "I detest confessions and I would like to get this over with…allow me to say that I will stand by you …against Corypheus…my countryman…and spurious rumor…as long as you will have me."

I swallow thickly happy that he's staying and at the same time my heart aches. "Thanks Dorian, although you realize that little display makes the rumors somewhat true." I tease lightly.

"If you don't care neither do I, we know the truth," He says firmly.

Yes we do, I think soberly.

"Enough of this sappy nonsense," Dorian says grinning as he changes the subject, "let's go to the tavern. I'm sure Varric will be ready to play Wicked Grace."

I can't keep the smile off my face, "Varric is always ready to take our money."


	3. You Can't Go Home Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izzy loses her clan....

When I enter the war room my advisors are already there, I feel a tension between them that I cannot describe. We take care of some matters but the tension doesn’t abate in fact it seems to grow stronger to the point I see all three of my advisors nervously shifting around. I am about to ask what is going on when Cullen finally speaks, “Inquisitor, I regret to inform you that, the Marchers threatening Wycombe did indeed attack and they killed all the elves in the alienage including all of your clan.” He hands me the mission report.

I am standing stunned for a moment and slowly take the mission report. I read it. I want to just crumple into a heap and die. My family, my clan…gone. I steel myself and school my face. “Thank you Cullen, are we finished for today?”

Everyone nods at me silently. 

“Then if you will excuse me,” I head toward the door. I find myself running through the main hall not caring if I’m making a scene. I just can’t be around people right now. I race up to my room quickly locking the door behind me. My face feels hot and I’m wracked with grief I can’t even begin to describe. My body physically hurts as I race to the balcony facing the mountains and lean over as stomach refuses to hold its contents any longer. My body just folds curling up into a ball on the balcony. 

I hear someone knocking at my door Cole asks to be let in, but I pay no mind and he finally goes away. I drag myself to my bed and let the blessed fade take me.  
I wake up and grab some water. Walking back out the balcony it was my decision. I tried diplomacy instead of force and my clan died for it. 

“You are hurting,” I hear a voice say as Cole appears over by the desk. “Please let me help.”

“No Cole, I will be fine.” I say in a firmer voice than I feel. “Please Cole there are others who need you… go help them.” 

“If that is what you want…I will do it.” He says disappointment apparent in his voice as he disappears again.

I feel tired all over again I hear knocking on the door again and I ignore it. I walk back to bed and fall asleep. The next time I wake, I see Dorian sitting on my bed. I look at him and grimace. “I thought I locked the door.”

“We have plenty of rogues here who can pick locks, little Amatus,” He chides lightly.

“Please just leave me be,” I plead looking at him.

“So you can sleep your life away…I think not.” Dorian says firmly as he pours me some tea. “You’ve been here almost 3 days, you didn’t answer when I knocked so I had Sera pick the lock for me. Everyone is worried about you. ”

“Everyone else is just worried about the precious inquisition!” I spit angrily, “I’m their stupid herald inquisitor person and I can’t even save my clan! But everyone expects me to save them all. The only ones who even tried to comfort me are you and Cole.”

Dorian looks shocked at my outburst. He sets down the tea and immediately wraps his arms around me pulling me into his lap. 

“I’m so sorry, little Amatus,” he says sadly, “I didn’t know what happened. No one told me. Cole came to me and said you needed help. I thought you had gone to Crestwood because that was next on your list. I would have come sooner had I known. What did happen?”

I totally forgot about going to Crestwood. I can’t speak so I gesture to the mission report on the table. He tightens one arm around me reaching over with the other grabbing the paper. His face falls as he reads it. He sets the paper aside and wraps the other arm around me. “What do you need?” He asks softly his voice muffled in my hair.

“Just hold me, stay with me,” I reply my voice wavering as it dissolves in to sobs.

“Anything you want, little Amatus.” He answers pulling me closer.


	4. Spurious Rumor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dorian and Izzy accidently add to the rumors surrounding them....

I wake up early. Considering most of what I’ve done is sleep for the past 3 days it’s not surprising. I am surprised by the fact I can’t move. Dorian has both arms protectively around me even as he sleeps. He is spooning me and my back is pressed against his muscular chest. He had obviously taken off his tunic to sleep and I can feel heat radiating from him through my thin sleeping tunic. He must have redressed me from my normal clothes while I slept. I blush at the thought. Then I notice he smells amazing…Elgar’nan’s ass. I breathe deeply smelling the essence that is Dorian with a sigh, just enjoying the moment. I shift ever so slightly to get more comfortable and his arms tighten around me. I sigh happily and doze off again. 

I wake a few hours later from hearing someone heading up my steps. Josephine pops up above the railing. “Inquisitor are you awake, I thought perhaps we … uh”  
The shocked look on Josephine’s face says it all. I have to admit I find it delightfully funny.

“Good morning to you too Josephine,” Dorian drawls tightening his hold on me as he just lifts his head to look at her. I snort inwardly. I know Dorian felt it because he grins wickedly. I hear more footsteps on the stairs and Cullen comes into view.

“Sorry to disturb your rest Inquisitor but our fortif…Oh sweet maker…my apologies,” the ex-templar blushes deeply.I can’t control my mirth at the situation so I don’t…I chuckle lightly. Before I can even regain my composure I hear more footsteps.

Quickly pulling myself together, Leliana comes into view. “Is something the matter?” As she looks over at us she smirks, “Oh I’m sorry Inquisitor …we can come back at more opportune time.”

The three turn and walk back down the stairs. “Did you see that?” I hear Josephine say. 

No!” Cullen says shortly.

“Didn’t see a thing,” Leliana giggles.

I sit up to look at Dorian and his mustache is twitching with mirth. I laugh hard; tears are streaming down my face. Unable to contain himself, Dorian joins me until we are both heaving a holding our stomachs.

“I’m glad to see you are in better spirits, little Amatus,” He says gasping as he catches his breath. “But you realize this will set tongues wagging.”

“So what,” I say shrugging my shoulders grinning at him, “there are worst things than people thinking you are involved with your best friend.”

He looks thoughtful for a minute, “this is true.” Then he snickers, “Mother Giselle will have her holy knickers in bunch. To be honest it’s totally worth it just for that.”

“Are you hungry? I took the liberty of bringing up a tray last night but you didn’t seem interested in food.” Dorian says with a bit of worry.

“Starving,” I say pulling back the blankets and standing up. I feel a bit weak and wobbly. I grab the side of the bed for support.

“Silly girl, you haven’t eaten in days, go sit on the couch and I will bring it to you,” Dorian chides lightly as he climbs out of the bed.

I obediently do as he says. He is so much more muscular than elven men it gives me a chance to look at his beautiful physique. 

“You look at me like you’ve never seen a man before,” He teases as he hands me a plate and cup of tea.

I blush lightly, “Well I haven’t seen a human man before at least not up close. Elven men aren’t …as broad and muscular.”

He looks at me thoughtfully, “of course you never left the clan until you went to the conclave, you’ve been surrounded by elves your whole life. But seriously Bull is topless all the time.”

“Bull is certainly larger comparatively speaking,” I say thoughtfully, “but Falon, you are more beautiful.”

“Is that the official term,” he says teasing.

I snicker, “why not? It’s not like you don’t appreciate it when people compliment you.”

“Of course I am more beautiful,” he says smugly, “how else could I be?”

I smile shaking my head at his smugness.

“You know something little Amatus,” Dorian says seriously, “You are quite beautiful yourself, Maker help the man that finally wins your heart.”

“Thank you, Falon.” I reply politely. But you have already won my heart.  
 


	5. Dance Lessons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izzy asks Dorian for dancing lessons well....because Vivienne is a B****

I’m on my way to speak with Dorian after Leliana has informed me Dorian is missing his Pavus family amulet. I decide to broach the subject with as much sensitivity as I can as the wound his family has dealt him is still very fresh. I’m really supposed to heading to see Vivienne as the advisors think I should learn the proper dances, for the ball. But I hate how Vivienne is damn condescending at times. So I decide to sneak in to the library instead.

“Playing hooky from learning proper dances?” Dorian grins as I enter his nook in the library.

He knows me too well and how much loathe taking lessons from Vivienne. She’s alright but a bit too stuck on herself and her own power it gets on my nerves.  
“I thought maybe you could teach me.” I tease lightly, “after all you are a noble and you would probably know the dances as well.”

I get a smirk in response. “I can and I think you might do better under a more understanding tutelage. I would be honored,” Dorians says bowing slightly holding out his hand.

I do a quick curtsy and take offered hand grinning back at him. “I’d hoped you wouldn’t mind,” I murmur appreciatively.

“Let us find Maryden, and a private, larger place to practice then,” Dorian says steering me toward the steps.

10 minutes later we are in one of the abandoned rooms with the bard and Dorian teaching me the steps of all the basic ballroom dances. He doesn’t scoff when I mess up like Vivienne does he just cheerfully has me try again.

Once I get the steps and am no longer watching my feet, Dorian insists I add some flourish to the dancing, it seems a bit silly at first but then I start to have a bit of fun with it. I realize it’s similar to fighting and that I can understand.

I don’t know how much time as gone by but we are flying across the floor. “I heard something about an amulet,” I say conversationally.  
Dorian almost forgets to move, he is…stunned. Taking a tighter hold my hand and my waist he moves me powerfully around.  
“How did you hear about that?” He hisses.

I’m a bit taken back by his response, but I try to keep things light “A little birdie told me.”

“Oh Leliana, of course she would find out.” He realizes wryly as he relaxes his grip a bit, “don’t make an issue of it. I don’t want someone solving my problems for me. I‘ll get the amulet back…somehow. On my own.”

He seems rather firm on this so I let that go and just say, “I’m not entirely certain what it is.”

“The Pavus birthright,” Dorian explains unhappily as we continue to move, “the flashy thing you show peons to make the tremble at your impressive lineage. I didn’t leave tevinter with much in the way of coin. So I sold it...entirely forbidden of course and foolish…but I was desperate. I’ll figure something out.”

“You don’t even like your family,” I say curiously, “why would you want it back?”

“Because it’s mine,” He says simply, “and it shouldn’t be…passed around like candy.”

“And that’s the only reason?” I ask with a raised eyebrow. I’m not quite buying it.

“It’s reason enough,” Dorian says shortly, “Leave it be.”

I look at him with disbelief, “For something that seems so important, I would have expected more than, I’ll get it back…somehow.”

“It’s not the only thing that is important,” Dorian sighs, “I lost the amulet, I may not have your resources but I cannot ask you to …you have too many people asking you for everything under the sun. I won’t be one of them!”

I just nod accepting what he says but I know in my heart I will help him. Of all the people I feel I have to help. He doesn’t realize that I would want to do this for him. He’s helped me so much it’s the least I can do for him. I would like to show my appreciation.

“I’m bored with all this ballroom dance,” He says suddenly grinning as he changes the subject, “let me teach you something a bit more fun.” He walks over and after speaking to Maryden who smirks at his suggestion. He walks back over to me and spins me around so my back is against his chest and grinds his hips suggestively against me. I blush deeply this and look up over my shoulder at him curiously.

“Antivan dance,” He answers my unspoken question. I nod and allow him to show me the steps and the moves. I find this to be easier to learn and not as stilted as the ballroom dance he previously had shown me. It flows more and I find myself grinning at him. Dorian seems to happier now as well the conversation about the amulet forgotten.

We dance until we are both out of breathlessly laughing and falling to floor. “I’ve forgotten how much fun it was to dance like this.” Dorian heaves, “And you my dear are natural, do all Dalish have this aptitude?”

Before I can answer we are interrupted. “So you skipped your dance lesson with me to learn this?” Vivienne calls from the door disapprovingly.

I give Vivienne a cocky look, “Not entirely, Madame de Fer.” I look at Dorian who is grinning from ear to ear. “Shall we?” I ask him.

He responds with a wicked nod, and gestures over to Maryden. She nods in understanding and starts playing one of the normal ballroom dance numbers. Dorian bows as I do the appropriate curtsy. We waltz across the floor effortlessly. To be honest I learned it better with Dorian than I ever would with Vivienne but I don’t say anything I let the dance speak for me.

We dance all 3 dances that Dorian taught me, leaving out the Antivan one.

Once we have finished, Vivienne looks us both up and down, and says “Well, I suppose that is adequate.” And she turns and walks away the train of her robes swishing angrily as she leaves.

I stifle my laughter, until I realize she out of earshot, and then I start giggling, “Mythal forbid, someone teaches me better than she could.”


	6. A Secret Mission

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izzy goes behind Dorian's back to get his amulet for him.

I’m headed to Val Royeaux; it seems a man by the name of Ponchard has Dorian’s family amulet in his possession. I know Dorian may be angry at me for going behind his back. I hope he will be happy to have the amulet back regardless. After all he didn’t ask but I wanted to do this for him. 

As I walk up to the prearranged place to meet Ponchard a man approaches me. “Inquisitor, good, good. This is exactly what I had hoped for.”

I lean back against a pillar casually looking at the masked nobleman in front of me less than impressed. Ponchard, I assume.

“Do forgive me, Inquisitor but when I heard of your…association with Monsieur Pavus, I could not resist. It’s not coin I seek for the amulet, but influence. Influence you possess but which the young man does not,” Ponchard explains, “Provided of course you…desire the amulet for your friend?”

“Aren’t you a merchant?” I ask curiously, “why not just sell it back?”

“I am not a fence, monsieur.” He says haughtily, “I only bought your friend’s amulet because of what it is. I do business in the imperium. Having a birthright, even one not of your own is most useful in…select situations.”

“I understand the situation,” I reply dryly.

“That’s why I paid the young man so much,” Ponchard continues. “If he relinquished it, how is that my doing?”

“So you refused the sell Dorian the amulet back …just to get me here,” I say cunningly. “Mission accomplished…but what do you want?”

“I apologize Inquisitor I am not trying to manipulate you, my lady. I merely wish equitable recompense,” he explains quickly. “The League de Celestine is an organization of wealthy noblemen in Orlais. I would join but I lack the lineage. If someone like you applied pressure, they would admit me. That would be worth the return of the amulet.”

“So I take it to understand no amount of wealth will get you in then?” I ask curiously.

“The League de Celestine is a very selective and based on lineage and wealth,” Vivienne explains smiling that she can lecture on something. Ponchard nods at Vivienne’s explanation.

I feel the man is being honest and really wishes no ill will on the Inquisition or Dorian. He obviously wants very much to belong to this elite group. I don’t even try to understand why but he is earnest about it. “Very well,” I sigh, “I agree to your request.”

“Much obliged your worship. The moment I receive an invitations from the league I will have the amulet delivered. It’s been an honor doing business with you.” Ponchard replies gratefully.  
“Perhaps you could stop by Skyhold and speak with our Quartermaster; we may be interested in what you have to offer.” I offer cautiously.

Ponchard beams, “I would like that very much. I was told you were as cunning as you are beautiful. Seems the rumors are true. In that case I will deliver the amulet personally.”

“Thank you, Monsieur Ponchard.” I reply as I turn to walk away.

Back at Skyhold I head to the war table to have the advisors help Ponchard get into the League de Celestine. A week later Ponchard comes to speak with quartermaster Eustace. Eustace brings me the amulet.

I head upstairs to Dorian’s nook. He is reading as is the norm for him so I move the books in the chair next to him and have a seat. “I have something for you,” I say holding out my hand. He looks at me questioning for a moment and puts his hand underneath mine as I drop the amulet into his hand.

“It’s …the Pavus birthright!” he says excitedly, “how did you? Why?” his face changes to anger. “I got myself into this. I sold this because I was desperate. I wanted to get it back on my own. What I didn’t want was to be indebted to you or anyone. Now I am.”

“Why did you even try to get it back?” I ask curiously. I’m beginning to think his pride at this is foolish so I’m not even going acknowledge it.

Dorian sighs. “When I left home, I wanted nothing so much as to divest myself of anything belonging to my family. But when I spoke to my father he noticed it was gone. He asked about it. It was childish to sell it. I love my country and this…it’s a symbol, it means I’m a part of it. You must think I’m foolish and sentimental.”  
I shake my head looking at him. “The amulet is important to you, why would wanting it be foolish?”

“And you went and retrieved it for me…now I’m in your debt,” He says angrily.

“I didn’t do this so you would be indebted to me Dorian.” I explain gently, “I did it for you. You are my clan…my family…as much as your family was to you. We take care of each other in the Clan. We love everyone within our clan and what is important to them is important to us. There is no debt. It is out of love.”

“That is the problem,” He says sadly.

“How is that a problem?” I ask not understanding.

“Someone intelligent would cozy up to the Inquisitor, if they could,” He explains. “It’d be foolish not to. She can open doors get you what you want. Shower you with gifts and power. That’s what they’ll say; I’m the magister who’s using you.”

“I had no idea you were concerned about that,” I reply looking at the floor. “Would it make you feel any better to tell you I got the merchant to supply Skyhold as well?”

“I don’t care what they think about me,” Dorian says reaching over to lift my chin so I am looking at him. “I care what they think about you and yes it does make me feel better that you were able to bring the merchant in. Clan huh?”

I grin at him.

“I am apparently an ass about accepting gifts,” He says pulling me onto his lap for hug. “I apologize and thank you.”  
 


	7. Drinking with The Chargers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izzy meets the chargers and has a drink with Iron Bull

The Iron Bull has asked me to have a drink with him and his chargers. It’s an eye opening experience I can’t help but feel bad for some of the chargers as their lives haven’t been very happy ones. I especially feel for Dalish. Part of me wants to ask what clan she was from that instead of sending her to clan needing mages they just sent her out on her own. It makes me think of my own clan. Clan Lavellan never did that there are so few Dalish left as it is. Even if we had “too many mages” we found a way. We thought of them as ours regardless.

Finally all the chargers wander off and it’s just Iron Bull and I. He pours me a tankard of whatever it is he is drinking and gives me hard look. “You love him don’t you?” he asks perceptively.

I can’t control the slight blush that comes to rest on my cheeks but I play dumb. “I love all of my friends.” I answer evenly.

“Come on Ally, I’m Ben Hassrath. I can read people. You hide it well and I understand why,” Bull says gently.

I take a gulp of the nasty concoction in the tankard. “Very well then, I suppose I do.” I reply.

“You should tell him,” He says evenly.

“There isn’t much point,” I say sadly unable to meet his eyes. “I’m sure your training has told you that, I am not exactly his type. Besides he has eyes for someone else.”

Dorian has mentioned that he finds our large friend quite attractive. Bull gives me a searching as if he is waiting for me to speak. “I would not begrudge the two of you happiness, Bull,” I say simply, “This is my issue. I’ll get past it at some point.”

“And that is crux of real love, the very fact you would put someone else’s needs and happiness above your own. In spite of the fact, it hurts you,” He states with almost uncharacteristic compassion. “Under the Qun, most entanglements of this type are forbidden, but it is not unheard of.”

“Oh?” I ask curiously, “I was under the impression that the Qun wouldn’t allow such relationships.”

“They don’t,” Iron Bull explains. “But every now and then it happens. The couple involved is tested thoroughly to make sure they can do their jobs, as love is by nature selfish. If they cannot put the needs of the Qun above their own they are separated. However, there a few couples that make it work. You would probably do well under Qun…well if you weren’t collared and such for being a mage that is.”

“Is every mage collared?” I ask curiously.

Iron Bull nods regretfully. “Yes, I understand it sometimes with what I’ve seen. But I’ve also seen productive members of the qun, who do their jobs diligently, come into magic later. They are collared with their mouths sewn shut as if they never had a job under the Qun before.”

He sighs. “But back to our original discussion, one day Dorian will know what a good friend you have been to him…” Bull reaches over and gives me a one armed hug. “A toast to great friends,” he says raising his cup. I raise mine with him and smile.

Dorian has been happy. After my chat with Iron Bull, they have started a romantic relationship. I don’t know how serious it is and I haven’t asked. I’m happy that he is happy although it does break my heart at the same time. I realize that it might do me some good to stop pining over what I can’t have and move on. I just don’t know how. It’s not like I’ve any experience with romantic entanglements. The Dalish have mates for life. My clan is gone. My life has irrevocably changed. I cannot go back and humans do things differently. The Inquisition for intents and purposes is my clan now, so I must adjust.


	8. A Chat With Varric

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Varric expresses his concern for Izzy over Dorian

I walk into my room and find I…Varric? waiting for me. What he is doing here? He usually hunts me down at the Herald’s Rest or in the main hall when he wants to talk.

“What can I do for you Varric?” I ask curiously.

“I know it’s none of my business,” Varric starts, “but are you okay? I mean from what I understood, you and Dorian had a romantic relationship and now he and Iron Bull are involved.”

I chuckle lightly as I could feel the questions from everyone that no else had the nerve to voice to me. Varric looks at me curious about my mirthful reaction.  
“Its fine Varric, at least you had the stones to ask outright. Everyone else has been tiptoeing around the subject,” I explain smiling. “Everyone assumed because Dorian stayed in my room from time to time, that we had a romantic relationship. We are just close friends who helped each other through the hardest times of our lives. He had family issues and I had clan issues. I love him dearly, but we are not in that type of relationship, as you may have noticed he prefers men. We decided to let everyone just assume what they wanted to. It’s not like they would have believed us anyway.”

Varric grins wickedly. “Well, you have a point there. And I imagine it was fun getting Mother Giselle all riled up about it, with her issues about Tevinter.”

I laugh outright remembering the Revered Mother’s angry reaction, “Yes, Dorian and I both thought that was a nice side effect. She was beside herself wasn’t she?”

Varric snickers. “Well I won’t tell her any different. But if you don’t mind I think this will make a wonderful twist for a story. “

“Have at it my literary friend,” I tease lightly as I grab a bottle of wine hold it out to him.

He nods in agreement and I start to grab the cork to open it. But he stops me taking the bottle from my hands and opening it himself. I grab the wine glasses from the table and bring them over to my couch gesturing for him sit.

“So how are you really?” Varric asks with concern once we had both settled on the couch. “I mean, by the void! You fall out of the breach, go into the future, fight a magister darkspawn, get crushed and in avalanche, and then your clan gets killed. I don’t know but I think that might leave you feeling at least a bit lost.”

“I do feel a bit lost in the place of people so different from my own,” I admit. “But I am trying to find my place.”

“I think you have done well,” Varric says encouragingly. “You’ve built the inquisition into a force to be reckoned with. Ferelden, Orlais, Tevinter, Nevarra, Antiva and even Par Vollen have taken notice. I am amazed the Qunari offered an alliance, especially after what happened in Kirkwall.”

“Well from what I understand they have a new Arishok now,” I say diplomatically. “Leliana mentioned she traveled with him during the blight.”

“When the Qunari came to get their dreadnought,” Varric explains, “I was told the Qunari disavowed the old Arishok’s actions. Apparently the Arishok didn’t get permission before he attacked Kirkwall and the Qun didn’t want another exalted march. They just said; we will never speak of this again. As far as I can tell that’s the Qun’s version of an apology.”

“That does sound very qunish considering how Bull describes them,” I smile at the thought.

“So what are your plans after we beat Corypheus?” He asks curiously. “Settle down? Have a bunch of cute pointy eared little ones running around?”

“I haven’t really thought that far ahead, Varric,” I lie, “it would depend on if I survive this.”

“You lie well, your inquisitorialness,” Varric chides. “But you better learn to control your hands when you do so.”

“Very well,” I sigh, realizing I was twisting my hands, “To be honest, I don’t know.”

“Well, maybe one day the right person will come along,” Varric says comfortingly. “Even Hawke found Fenris eventually.”


	9. Proposals

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izzy is inundated with marriage proposals

Cullen, Josephine, Leliana and I are finishing up a meeting at the war table. When Josephine mentions there is one more thing that needs addressing.  
We all look at her waiting for her speak. She clears her throat nervously. “Well you see Inquisitor; there have been several requests for your hand in marriage. There are 5 from major noble families in Orlais, Ferelden, and Antiva. We need to answer these requests.”

I look at her in astonishment, too stunned to even be angry. “So these nobles actually thought I might agree to an arranged marriage? Do they not understand, I am Dalish and we don’t do things that way? Are you insane? Burn them!”

Cullen snorts with mirth at my reaction and I see Leliana smirk.

“I understand how you feel Inquisitor, but they must be answered protocol dictates …” Josephine continues.

“To the void with their protocol!” I say angrily. “I am Dalish not some noble! I refuse to be joined to some noble and treated like a second class citizen! If an answer must be sent, burn the requests and send them the ashes!”

Cullen can’t help the snicker that escapes him as I hear Leliana stifle a chuckle. I look at them and despite my annoyance; I can’t help but to grin wickedly.

“Inquisitor, if we don’t answer these requests we may lose some of our most influential supporters,” Leliana says schooling her face as she softly cajoles me.

I think about it for moment as I know the inquisition…needs noble support. My thoughtful expression goes cunning I come up with an idea. I know I will not end up marrying some noble twit but I plan to let them think they have a chance.

“Very well,” I say smirking. “If these families insist on this they must do it my way. I will not marry for political gain as I have done much for the inquisition and my private life is not on the bargaining table. Let the suitors come to Skyhold and court me. If I find someone, I can love, I will marry. I will not marry until after we have dealt with Corypheus assuming that I survive. My mate must be willing to leave their country or estate, and stay with me in at Skyhold. As I am sure, provided I survive, the Inquisition will need me and I expect to be treated with respect. Also do make sure they realize that I am Dalish and a mage.”

All 3 advisors look at me with astonishment.

“Will this satisfy the needs of protocol?” I ask facetiously.

Josephine nods wordlessly and then finds her voice. “I…I will send the letters off immediately.”

“Are you sure about this?” Cullen asks with concern.

“Yes, this way I have satisfied noble protocol and given them chance under my terms,” I explain. “It would also give us more insight into what the noble families really think of the Inquisition. I plan to have Iron Bull shadow me, as my body guard or chaperon if you prefer…his Ben Hassrath training will invaluable here.”

Leliana looks over at me with a surprised smirk. “You are devious one Inquisitor. I like this idea.”

Cullen nods in agreement. “It’s a good plan.”

“I’ll go inform Iron Bull of his new job,” I say taking my leave.

Entering the Herald’s Rest I find Iron Bull and Dorian sitting at their regular table. “Mind if I join you?” I ask smiling.

“Sure Boss, now that you’ve gotten away from the constant meetings,” Iron Bull answers as Dorian grabs me a chair.

“My lady,” Dorian teases as I sit in the proffered chair and he moves back to his chair to sit.

“Bull, I have a job for you. It seems bunch of nobles think my hand in marriage is on the bartering table,” I explain with a smirk.

To my surprise Dorian interrupts me before I can get another word in. “You can’t be seriously considering this, my dear,” His face is indecipherable.

“No, I have a plan. That is why I’m asking for Bull’s help. If you’d be so kind to let me finish, Falon,” I tease with a grin.

Dorian relaxes and Iron Bull grins. “So who do I need to kill?” 

“No killing is necessary; I will need your skills as a bodyguard and Ben Hassrath though,” I explain smirking again.Both men look at me curiously.  
“I had to follow protocol to a point but I invited the suitors here,” I elaborate, taking a sip of my drink. “Their purpose, no doubt, will be to court me and try to win my hand to gain more influence. However, I am planning to use the opportunity to find out exactly were the Inquisition stands with these powerful families. That is where you come in Bull. Acting as my bodyguard and chaperon you can use your Ben Hassrath abilities to find deception. I can fulfill the requirements of protocol and send them on their way.”

“Well that is one way to deal with the issue,” Dorian says looking relieved.

“It’s not like I can leave Inquisition, like you did Tevinter, to get away from an arranged marriage,” I quip.

Dorian grins. “That is true, little Amatus.”


	10. Finishing School

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izzy prepares for the Winter Palace

I have been prepped for weeks on playing the grand game, honing my social skills and learning how to school my face and body to give away nothing by Leliana, Josephine, Vivienne, and Dorian. I am ready for the Winter Palace. Once word got out I was receiving suitors on my terms, I thought many would drop out and some did but more have decided to throw themselves into the running. Realizing because many of the “suitors” that are coming to Skyhold will be at the Winter Palace my appearance and social graces must be above reproach. Everyone is in my room today as we work with the dressmaker to create the perfect dress.

“Before we start I am going set some ground rules,” I call out getting everyone’s attention, “There will be no corset and no frilly Orlesian dress.”  
Josephine and Vivienne start to object but I interrupt them.

“I realize this is ball but you need to realize it is also an assassination attempt and if I can’t breathe or move the empress may die.” I say practically.

“She’s right you know,” Leliana says cheerfully looking at me.

I look at her gratefully. “Ma serannas.”

“Perhaps a mix of Dalish ceremonial dress style and Orlesian fabric then,” Josephine says diplomatically.

“That could work,” Leliana says smirk.

I pull out my original set of Dalish ceremonial robes and lay them gently across my bed for the dressmaker.

Vivienne wrinkles her nose and looks at me. “Darling, you must be kidding.”

“Perhaps instead of pauldrons we could go with a puffy sleeve at the top, the rest of the sleeve is fitted,” Josephine offers thoughtfully.

“The lacing going up the sleeve is a nice touch and would look good with a puffy shoulder,” Dorian proposes smiling.

“That could work,” Vivienne agrees to my astonishment.

“I agree,” Leliana says with a smile.

“You must pick a fabric, darling,” Vivienne says grabbing my hand and taking over to the couch were the fabrics are set out.

I look at the fabrics there is a ring velvet fabric that catches my eye it is emerald green with a subtle design. “This one,” I say picking it up for Vivienne’s perusal. She takes the fabric holding it up to me.

“I have to say you do have exquisite taste, my dear,” She says in a light tone belying her surprise. “This color will be fantastic on you and the fabric is amazing.”

“We need something for the waist area where you would usually have a corset,” Josephine says practically. “The cut of the original robes is low so you will not be able to wear a breast band.”

“She doesn’t need one,” Dorian cuts in smiling. I blush lightly at the comment. 

“How about this?” I ask, fingering a soft, reddish, chestnut colored leather. 

“Of course the leather both contrasts and compliments the color and texture of the ring velvet,” Josephine says eagerly. The others nod in agreement. 

“Well little Amatus,” Dorian says smiling. “You are better at this than I had hoped.” 

I let the dress maker take my measurements, and the fabric and the leather along with my original dress. She gets started promising to back soon to fit the dress.

“Now we need some shoes,” Leliana says excitedly.

I don’t think I’ve ever seen so many shoes in my life. They just keep coming. I try on a pair of shoes with high heels and pointy toes and almost break an ankle.  
I sit down in a chair, “This is not going to work, I need something I can walk in at and possibly run in and fight in…we don’t know what we a facing at the Winter Palace.”

“As much as I love those shoes…I hate to say that you are right,” Leliana sighs.

“Sorry Leliana,” I say shaking my head, “I’m not even used to the regular shoes you humans wear. The soles alone make me feel unbalanced. Even without a heel.”

“That’s right,” Dorian says walking to my closet, and grabbing my heavy foot wraps. He looks at them thoughtfully for a moment. “What if we did something like this in the snoufleur leather you chose earlier with thin leather soles and a rounded toe. You have small feet. Most human women try to make their feet look smaller with pointy toes anyway.”

“We could make it supple boot with ties that match the ones on the sleeves. But I think we need to make them in the ring velvet fabric…perhaps doing the boots in the leather will be too much contrast.” Leliana recommends.

“But how high should the boots go?” Dorian asks nodding in agreement with Leliana.

“I think just below the knee would work beautifully,” Vivienne says smiling, “Her legs are one of her best assets.” 

“Please don’t talk about me as if I’m not here,” I say sharply but grinning to show I’m not really angry.

“I’m sorry, Inquisitor,” Josephine says smiling, “it’s not every day we get to do this, you know.”

“What do you think?” Leliana asks looking at me curiously.

“I think I like Dorian’s idea of thin leather soles and rounded toes, as it will make it easier to run if I need to,” I say smiling. “I also agree with Leliana’s suggestion to use the ring velvet. If I remember correctly Josephine had told me at one point that using the same color can make you look taller.” Josephine beams at me nodding.

“As for the length,” I say thoughtfully, “I think Vivienne’s suggestion will work as I don’t want to worry about figuring out a way of keeping them up since they will be made of fabric and not leather.”

“A very practical attitude,” Vivienne says pointedly, “You just need to take that hideous necklace off.”

I look at Vivienne with a horrified look, “Absolutely not!”

“It’s special to you isn’t it,” Dorian asks softly. I mutely nod in agreement. “May I see it?” He asks. I untie the leather strap and hand it to him.

“It’s actually wonderful workmanship,” he says looking at the golden leaf. Josephine comes over to look at the pendent in his hand. 

“Goodness, is it solid gold?” she asks looking me.

“Yes, it was a gift from my clan,” I explain feeling my throat tighten.

Vivienne and Leliana make their way over to Dorian and take turns looking at the pendant. Vivienne regards me with softened expression. “Perhaps we can change the leather strap it’s on for maybe a fine gold chain?” she asks.

“That would be agreeable,” I say smiling at her.

“You keep it on the leather so you can wear it all the time don’t you?” Leliana says perceptively.

I nod at her smiling and say thickly, “It’s one of the few things…I have left from my clan.”

“Now all we need to do is makeup,” Josephine says changing the subject. “I’ll get the idea for the boots to the seamstress and cobbler. I think the rest of you can handle this I still have much to do.”

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The next day, Dorian, Leliana, and Vivienne come to my room to show me how to do makeup. I let Dorian and Vivienne pick out make-up and varnish colors as they insist my nails need to be manicured as well.

The seamstress returns with the dress to fit it and make final adjustments.

I walk behind my dressing screen and change into the dress a mirror has been brought out so I can see. I admit I am stunned looking at my reflection. The gold colors on my eyelids make my eyes pop and the liner they used makes them almost look feral…exotic. My cheeks are lightly flushed with the blush…I think they called it. And my lips have a peachy pink hue with a bit of golden shine. 

The dress is cut just like the ceremonial robes. The sleeves are tight but have the lacing going up them, to a puffed short sleeve at the top were usually there would be feather or fur pauldrons. The wide v-neckline dips down to just below my breasts and the seamstress added a bit lacing at the bottom of the V as well. The waist of the dress is soft and comfortable and the snoufleur leather is quite supple, conforming to my body. The skirt of the dress is divided into 2 parts, the back and sides are one piece and the front is the second piece the slits comes clear up to my hips but the fabric slightly overlaps at the top for modesty and the slits themselves give me room to move. A belt that matches the leather on the waist is slung over my hips. The matching boots are comfortable as I can stretch my toes and they don’t feel compressed in any way. 

“Is this really me?” I ask breathlessly looking at myself. I guess this is how a princess or queen feels…

Leliana giggles with happiness. “Of course that’s you, silly.”

“Little Amatus,” Dorian says taking a ragged breath, “You look absolutely ravishing.”

“We should dress you up more often, Inquisitor,” Leliana agrees smiling.

“I suppose you will do,” Vivienne says a bit haughtily looking at my tattooed legs, “However, I think your tattoos will need make-up to cover them.” 

I give her a hard look. “I will not cover them,” I state firmly.

“Perhaps you should as your suitors will be at the ball?” Leliana asks trying to go for different angle.

“No, if the suitors want to marry me then they will see me for who I am,” I say evenly, “I will not hide who I am or where I come from. I would expect no less from them.”

I note that Leliana seems to be thinking upon my words.

“But they are all over, my dear,” Vivienne cajoles gesturing at the vines running down my thighs.

“Ally is right you know,” Dorian says protectively looking at me.

“The inquisitor has made it clear she will only marry for love,” Leliana says looking at Vivienne, “I know you chose Bastian for love as well, although his influence may have been the initial draw…you stayed for love. Can you expect her to do any less?”

“Your argument…is sensible,” Vivienne relents softly.

The seamstress steps in at this point and does some final pinning before having me slip out of the dress and boots. Leliana speaks to her as I sit on the couch with Dorian and nibble on some fruit.

“You looked incredible in that dress, Amatus,” Dorian says smiling ruefully, “Your suitors won’t know what hit them.”


	11. Meeting Gaspard

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izzy finally meets Grand Duke Gaspard

We walk through the gates in the outer garden of the winter palace and Grand Duke Gaspard is waiting. “Inquisitor Lavellan,” he says in way greeting, “we meet at last. I’ve heard so much about you, bringing the templars into the inquisition was not only a brilliant military strategy but a clever political one as well. Imagine with the full support of the rightful heir of Orlais what could be accomplished.”

I smile and tease lightly, “and which one would that be? I keep getting them confused.”

He looks at me intently as if looking for deceit, seeing none, he smiles. “The handsome charming one of course, my lady.” He chuckles lightly. “I am not a man who forgets his friends, Inquisitor. You help me and I’ll help you.” 

I give him my most charming smile. He offers me his arm and I take it allowing him to walk me across the garden. “I was told you were beautiful, Inquisitor but I really had no idea until I saw you with my own eyes. I may have to throw my gauntlet in the ring as one of your suitors.” Gaspard says letting his eyes roam over me then resting them on my face.

I expected this type of behavior, so I smile and let him lead on.

“My lady, are you prepared to shock the court by walking into the grand ball with a hateful usurper? They will be telling stories of this into the next age.” Gaspard says only half facetiously.

I chuckle lightly as is appropriate. “I can’t imagine that crowd had seen anything better than us in their entire lives.”

“You’re a woman after my own heart, my lady,” he says teasingly. “As a friend there is a matter that I would like you to undertake this evening. This elven woman Briala, I suspect that she intends to disrupt the negotiations. My people have found these ambassadors all over the fortifications. Sabotage seems to be the least of their crimes.”

“That sounds like something I should look into,” I note lightly.

Gaspard sighs; it seems that this war is starting to wear on him. “Be as discreet as possible. I detest the game, but if we do not play it well, our enemies will make us look like villains.”

I nod in understanding. I was a bit surprised at the man’s honesty. From all the behaviors I’ve seen in Orlais everyone loves their grand game and other countries try to emulate it. I might just have to give this noble a chance as I appreciate his bluntness.

“We are keeping the court waiting, Inquisitor, shall we?” he asks.

“But of course,” I smile as he guides me to the doors.

Upon entering the Winter Palace, I expected Gaspard to walk ahead of me as I was told was customary for the introductions. However he tightens is grip on my arm, I realize he is trying to make a statement. So I smile charmingly as he is introduced; and now presenting Grand Duke Gaspard de Chalons and accompanying him Lady Inquisitor Lavellan. We walk down the steps gracefully. He bows as I curtsy to the Empress. Then the announcer goes on; vanquisher of the rebel mages of Ferelden, crusher of the vile apostates of the mage underground. 

I hear Varric whisper. “This guy writes fiction better than I do.” I stifle my snort letting my face remain passive.

The announcer continues; Shepard and leash of the wayward order of templars. Purger of the heretics in the ranks of the faithful!

Then I hear Sera, “He is so full of it! That’s not how it went.”

I want to smirk at her but I decide to smile charmingly instead as everyone is watching the two of us. 

Champion of the Blessed Andraste herself! The announcer finishes. 

Gaspard looks at me. “Thank you for walking with me, Inquisitor.” He leans over brushing his lips over my cheek and everyone gasps in shock. 

I lean over gracefully ghosting my lips across his ear and whisper “well played.”

Gaspard chuckles quietly. “Did you see their faces? Priceless. Come see me on the left balcony later. I wish to speak with you.” With that he turns to walk down the rest of the steps. 

The announcer moves on to my companions; "Accompanying the Inquisitor, Madame Vivienne, first enchanter of the circle of magi, Enchanter of the Imperial Court, Mistress of the Duke of Ghislain." Vivienne walks gracefully sashaying, down the steps, as I wait for the rest to be announced.

"The Iron Bull, leader of the famed mercenary company The Bull’s Chargers, as the name might imply." Bull heads down the steps as well.

"Her Ladyship Mai Balsych of Korse." I almost snort again, that had to be one Sera’s jokes. She snickers giving me a mischievous look and wink as she walks by. 

"Seeker Cassandra Allegra Portia Caldgera Filomena…" Cassandra interrupts the announcer impatiently, “Get on with it!”  
"Pentaghast, 14th cousin to the King of Nevarra, nine times removed. Hero of Orlais, right hand of the Divine." Cassandra strides down the steps quickly, as if she is trying to get away from her names.

"Lord Dorian Pavus, member of the Circle of Verantium, son of Lord Magister Halward Pavus of Asariel." Dorian grins at me as he struts down the steps.

"Ser Cullen Stanton Rutherford of Honnleath, Commander of the forces of the Inquisition, Former Knight- Commander of Kirkwall." Cullen looks unhappy as he walks down the steps. I know he really doesn’t want to be here but Leliana and Josephine insisted.

"Lady Leliana, Nightingale of the Imperial Court, Veteran of the Fifth Blight, Mistress to the Queen of Ferelden, Mistress to the King of Ferelden, Seneschal of the Inquisition, and Left hand of the Divine." I admit to being slightly shocked she is mistress to both the Queen and the King. Leliana, what have you been doing? She walks down the steps giving me charming grin which I know is her smirk.

"And Lady Josephine Cherette Montilyet of Antiva City, Ambassador of the Inquisition. " Josephine walks down the steps gracefully and I follow behind her, thankful that the wordy introductions are done.

I engage in sucking up to the Nobles to increase my influence which seems to be working, even the Dowager finds me charming. I am also collecting secrets for Leliana and Sera has even found some red jenny stashes for the inquisition. 

A brief meeting with the court apostate Morrigan confirms what I originally thought, that she isn’t behind this. However, she doesn’t seem like the type to bow down to anyone. In fact she seems to be one of the few people wanting to protect Celene. After all without Celene she would probably not have a position at court.

Unsurprisingly it seems Gaspard hasn’t been totally honest with me, I kind of expected it as to him I am an unknown to him. He’s unsure if I’m an ally or enemy. However the lengths Briala has gone does surprise me a bit. Briala has had the ambassadors of Celene and Gaspard assassinated in hopes of creating more tension and has elven spies infiltrating every place in the castle. However I’ve seen nothing to implicate the Venatori at this time. Although, I have collected enough evidence to implicate any of them and disrupt Orlais, I’m unsure what to do. 

I end up speaking to Briala but I had actually been looking for Gaspard and entered the wrong balcony. This place is huge. I play along with my mistake engaging Briala in conversation. She compliments me on my skills with the court which she implies are above what she expected for a Dalish elf. She explains that Gaspard is warmonger and alludes to trying to manipulate him. She describes Celene as reasonable but too cautious and too quick to compromise. Her demeanor when talking about Celene is somewhat bitter. 

I understand her reasoning even if I don’t agree with her methods …I honestly think she is more dangerous than Gaspard or Celene. As she was very blunt in stating she would whatever is necessary for her race. If anyone would ally with the Venatori she would, given the opportunity but she seems ignorant of them. I also know after lengthy discussions with Leliana and Josephine on Orlesian history that Briala knew about Ser Michael and demanded a boon for her silence. That equates to untrustworthy in my book.

Walking back inside the Duchess Florianne has taken an interest in me. It seems she wishes to dance. I smile charmingly and lead her to dance floor, which gains me more approval with the court. We banter as the game instructs revealing nothing. However, she seems to want to implicate Gaspard along with Briala and Celene. It makes me wonder and after dancing with her what she is up too. After all why would Gaspard’s own sister turn against him?

After my dance with the duchess, Josephine walks over to me, grinning from ear to ear. “You’ll be the talk of the court for months. We should take you dancing more often!”

“It’s a relief to do something other than fight demons and horrors,” I quip smirking.

“You still face demons and horrors,” She says primly.

“These ones are just better dressed,” Dorian quips smirking.

“Were you dancing with duchess Florianne?” Leliana ask breathlessly as she makes her way over to me.

I nod quickly in reply as I see Cullen is making a beeline over to us as he comes to stop he asks, “More importantly, what happened in the servants’ quarters? I heard there was fighting.”

“I do hope you have good news,” Josephine cuts in, “it seems the peace talks are crumbling.”

“I have information to implicate any one of them, but nothing to connect any one of them to the venatori,” I admit. “However the duchess is trying to convince me that Gaspard is a traitor but I’m not buying it. She’s up to something.”

“Florianne and her brother are thick as thieves,” Leliana says thoughtfully, “But she would give him up in an instant to save herself.”

“Makes me wonder if she is the link…”I say slowly.

“Then…the attack will happen tonight,” Cullen confirms.

“Warning Celene is pointless,” Josephine explains. “She needs these talks to succeed, and to flee would admit defeat.”

“Perhaps we should let her die,” Leliana says dourly. I give her sharp look. “Listen to me Inquisitor, Leliana explains. “What Corypheus wants is chaos. Even with Celene alive, that could still happen. To foil his plan, the empire must remain strong. The evening, someone must emerge victorious.”

“And it doesn’t need to be Celene,” Cullen says in astonishment, “She’s right.”

Josephine looks horrified. “Do you realize what you’re suggesting, Leliana?”

“Sometimes the best path is not the easiest one,” Leliana says firmly.

It seems all three of the think to support a different person. I leave them to argue amongst themselves. I grab my party and head over to the royal apartments.

As we enter the area, Iron Bull says, “Even Leliana said this place was dangerous, and you just wanted to walk in here?”

“And thought you would be bored at this party.” Dorian says grinning at Iron Bull.

I give him a wicked grin in reply. “Let’s see what our nobles are hiding.”

“This party is getting better and better,” Bull smirks. 

“The duke seems very interested in you, Ally,” Dorian teases with a slightly strange lilt to his voice.

“It seems the Duke and I found some common ground. We both enjoy shocking the nobility,” I quip.

“Well who would’ve thought…?” Dorian replies thoughtfully.

Walking further down the hallway, I hear a scream. I race in the direction of the sound leaving my companions behind. I see a venatori attacking an elf. Unthinkingly, I race toward the venatori and kick her in the chest sending the assailant flying out the open window behind her. I race to the window and look down. The fall was far enough I see a crumpled body on the ground unmoving. Turning to the elf I crouch down. “Are you hurt?”

“I think…I’m in one piece,” the woman says shaking. “Thank you.”

After a few minutes she calms down and explains that Briala sent her to get something from the room but didn’t tell her what it was. She also explains that she knew Briala before and during the time that Briala was “Celene’s pet”, and would tell the world that while the alienage in Halamshiral was purged, Briala was sleeping with the empress. I send the woman to Cullen for her safety and continue searching the royal wing of the palace. 

Finding one of Gaspard’s men in the Celene’s bedroom naked and trussed like roast duck was quite amusing. The man admits that Celene used her feminine wiles to get the poor man to give her information on Gaspard’s troop movements. Celene knows everything and is just waiting for Gaspard to strike.

Sera laughs loudly. “She’ll be all prim, and here you are with your bits hanging out.”

“Classic honeypot,” Bull says shaking his head amused as Dorian grins at the man lecherously.

I agree to protect the poor man from Gaspard if he testifies against Celene.


	12. A Chat with the Duke

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izzy had a heart to heart with the Duke and causes a bit a scandal....

I think it’s time for Gaspard and me to have a chat. Making my way back to the ballroom, I find Gaspard on the left side second balcony.“You’ve been busy charming the court, I see,” Gaspard says offering me a glass of wine. “In fact you are much better at it than I.”

“High praise from one brought up to play the game,” I say slightly astonished taking the glass from him. “I would like to know more about you.”

“Most of Orlais knows my story, even you know I was raised to do nothing but be an emperor.” Gaspard answers candidly. “But you are far too sensible to be Orlesian. The heart of the matter is simple: I am the rightful heir to the throne. My cousin Celene is a politician while I am a man of action. She charmed the Council of Heralds. They gave the crown to her and while it looks fetching on her, I intend to take it back.”

“A straightforward goal,” I admit. I can’t help but like this man after all the scheming and lying I’ve been exposed to this evening. His honestly is refreshing and welcome.

“We are straightforward people, you and I,” Gaspard replies. “But at court twists and turns are in fashion. We must navigate a den of vipers, but maker willing, there will be enough port.”

“What are hoping to achieve with the negotiations?” I ask curiously tilting my head. “I am aware that you did not extend the invitation out of the goodness of your heart, Grand Duke.” I’m trying to gauge how far he would push this before I give him any information.

“As you may have guessed, I am not the most political man,” He explains, “If the nobles believe the Inquisition supports me, it will help with the negotiations.”

“That is remarkably honest of you,” I reply with no small amount of astonishment.

“Well I do admit, I take joy in watching the scandalized expressions on the noble’s faces when they see us together,” He says with a roguish grin. As people are peeking through the door taking glances at us.

“Shall we scandalize them further,” I tease gesturing to sofa with a wicked grin. Gaspard nods in agreement and we sit on the sofa together. 

“What will be going on in these negotiations?” I ask curiously.

“We will whittle each other down with words until we are bored into agreement,” He replies sighing heavily. “Celene will talk circles around us, the elf will glower and cast suspicion everywhere and I will get very, very drunk. Somehow by the time they stop serving drinks, the war will be ended. Politics.”

“Really is that the way disagreements are settled in Orlais? I was under the impression there was more…” I start to ask but Gaspard interrupts me.

“Bloodshed?” He chokes out a laugh. “We are not as barbaric as Tevinter. I don’t want my cousin dead. I would not wish it to come to that. We did grow up together after all. The court thinks this is all a “game” but it is nothing of the sort.”

“We have a giant hole in the sky. None of this, matters,” I say feeling a bit outraged at the stupidity of the court. 

“You and I are in complete agreement, my friend. I would rather be on the battlefield right now.” Gaspard explains, “But I also realize the point of politics. Even if I don’t agree with how much our society revels in it.”

In that moment I make my decision. I lean over whispering in his ear. “Corypheus already has venatori here. I already killed many of them.” I note that there are more people passing by the door with scandalized expressions and I stifle a snicker. 

“Why would you tell me this?” Gaspard asks in low voice as he watches the doorway.

“I know much of your history, Duke Gaspard.” I answer quietly as to keep it between us. “I know the secret you keep about Michael de Chevin and why. Ser Chevin is working with Inquisition now. I also know that you tried to resolve this whole situation with Briala and Celene peacefully. I know you were an honorable man. I needed to see if you still are. I now know that you wouldn’t hand your country over to a Darkspawn Magister. I am certain you care too much about Orlais to do that. But someone else here has. Your sister tried to implicate you. I’m sorry.”

Gaspard looks taken back for a moment as he digests the information. “You've studied me then. You were testing me then?” I nod in reply. He gives me another one of those intense looks as he had done in the garden earlier. “Well done, Inquisitor. I would have done the same. You are a worthy adversary but I’m gratified I can call you …friend. Thank you.”

I look around quickly and see no servants or anyone for that matter. “I have some information for you,” I offer.

“Oh? Do tell.” Gaspard says sitting close to me and laying his arm on the back of the sofa. 

I take his hint and lean into him making it seem as if we are lovers taking a moment away from the whirlwind around us to enjoy each other. 

Leaning over and I whisper in his ear. “Briala has had ambassadors from both sides assassinated and switched their documents.”

Gaspard reaches over and brushes a lock of hair away from my face tucking it behind my pointed ear. “You can prove this?” He whispers back. “How interesting, I wonder what she is trying to accomplish. She bears closer watching than I thought.” His hand comes to rest upon my shoulder and he pulls me into his chest. I lay my head on his shoulder.

A servant comes with more wine at this point. “Please put it on the table.” Gaspard commands not moving from our embrace. The servant looks at the two of us in our somewhat compromising position. Shock is lacing his features as he all but runs from the balcony causing us both to snicker.

“I also found some information about you,” I whisper leaning into his neck. “Why did you threaten the council of heralds?”

“Oh that,” he chuckles huskily. “The language of politics my dear, if you can’t win them over you threaten them. Most of the council members are Celene’s lapdogs anyway. There was little chance of me winning their support any other way. Celene is a politician…I admit I am not.”

I see Dorian walk by the door and upon glancing our direction, I see strange mix of emotions cross his features. He schools his face nods to me and walks away.

“We must be careful,” I say as run my fingers along Gaspard’s mask. “Briala has spies everywhere pretending to be servants.”

“I thank you for your concern, my lady,” Gaspard says quietly as runs his hand up my thigh tracing the tattoo on the bare skin that is showing.

“I have one more warning for you,” I whisper slightly breathless as his touch is beginning to affect me. 

“Yes, my lady?” He says as his hands settle on my waist. 

I lean over letting my lips ghost over his ear. “Call off your attack, Celene knows. Taking the crown by force will only get you arrested for treason.” I feel him start almost unperceptively. He recovers immediately taking my face in his hands and gently pressing a chaste kiss to my lips. 

“Thank you, Inquisitor; you have been a loyal friend. I will call of the attack.” Gaspard says softly. 

I rise to my feet. “I should get back. I think we have scandalized the nobility enough for the moment.” I say grinning wickedly.

“Before you do, I wouldn’t mind scandalizing them a bit further; after all, you did dance with Duchess. How would you like to dance with the Duke?” He asks as he rises offering his hand. 

“I would be honored, Duke Gaspard.” I say smirking as take his offered hand.


	13. Dancing can be  Dangerous Affair

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izzy dances with the Duke and again with the Duchess...

The Duke speaks to the bards and leads me to the dance floor as they begin playing the next song. A fast waltz, I remember the steps to this one. Taking a quick glance around the dance floor I see Bull standing with Dorian. Dorian has a satisfied smirk on his face. I give him a smile in return. I have to admit much to my surprise the Duke is an excellent dancer. He leads strongly. Dancing with the Duke is much nicer than dancing with Duchess, who reminded me of a limp dishrag. I note that he is holding me a bit closer than what is really proper. But we are scandalizing the nobles after all. I smile charmingly at the Duke as he whirls me around the floor.

“It’s nice to dance with someone who dances well, Inquisitor,” The Duke says with a bit of surprise. 

I resist the urge to shrug. “I had a good teacher,” I explain, casting my glance over at Dorian.

“Truly, the Tevinter taught you?” he says curiously.

I nod in reply. “Believe it or not the Tevinter, is one of my dearest friends,” I explain simply. 

“You do have an interesting group of allies,” The Duke says chuckling lightly setting his gaze on Dorian and Iron Bull.

As the song comes to an end the duke decides to end the dance with an almost obscenely deep dip. “Thank you for the dance, my lady.” 

The scandalized murmurs of the nobility reach my ears as I leave the dance floor. Dorian is waiting with a smirk on his face. “First the Duchess, and now the Duke, what’s next dancing with the Empress herself?” He teases.

“I’ll save a dance for my best friend,” I quip.

“I’ll hold you to that,” he says grinning wickledly. “It could more dangerous. The Herald dancing with the dreaded Tevinter magister, how their tongues would wag!”

With that we head back to the royal apartments wing of the palace checking to see if there was anything we missed upon head to the gardens. The duchess has steered me here and I’m wondering why. The wing as has been closed off. Many of the nobles had said it was best garden in all of the Winter Palace so curious that it is closed off. I find Duchess Florianne with a group of Venatori waiting for me along with a fade rift. Seriously, the woman thought it was a good idea to open a damn fade rift in the Winter Palace?

“Inquisitor,” The Duchess drawls, “What a pleasure! I wasn’t sure you would attend. You’re such a challenge to read. I had no idea if you’d taken my bait.”

“I’m a little busy at the moment if you’re looking for dance partner,” I quip lightly. I hear Sera and Dorian snort behind me. 

“Yes I see that. Such a pity you didn’t save a last dance for me.” Florianne retorts sweetly. “It was so kind of you to walk into my trap willingly. I was so tired of your meddling.” Her demeanor changes to menacing. “Corypheus insisted that the empress die tonight and I would hate to disappoint him.”

“At this point, I’d think disappointment would be an old friend,” I counter smiling sweetly. 

“You poor deluded thing,” Florianne says with a saccharine tone. “You don’t know half of what Samson and I have planned and now I suppose you never will. In their darkest dreams, no one imagines, I would assassinate Celene myself. All I need is to keep you out of the ballroom long enough to strike. Pity you will miss the rest of the ball, Inquisitor. They will be talking about it for years.”

“Stupid nobles talk too much,” I hear Sera mutter. “Let’s just fight already.”

“Kill her!” Florianne commands the Venatori. “Bring me the marked hand as proof. It will make a fine gift, for the Master.”

With that the venatori and demons attack, after taking out the enemies and closing the rift. We find a mercenary hired by Gaspard. 

“Andraste’s tits,” the man swears rubbing his unbound wrists. “What was all that? Were those demons? There aren’t any more blasted demons coming, right?” 

“Good eye,” Dorian says sarcastically. “Those were demons.”

“Maker bless me! Demons!” The man says visibly shaken. “How could there be demons at the fucking winter palace? I knew Gaspard was a bastard but I didn’t think he’d feed me to fucking horrors over a damn bill.”

I can’t help but to snort. “You honestly believe you were captured, tied up, and thrown into a death trap…because of a bill?”

“Well,” the man says thinking about it, “When you put it like that, it does seem bit odd. The Duke wanted to move on the palace tonight but he didn’t have enough fancy chevaliers.” 

“Oh, so you didn’t get the new missive,” I explain lightly. “The attack on the palace was called off.”

“Well, I did get separated from the rest of the group,” The man says thinking about it a moment. 

“I can offer you something,” I say giving the man a measured look. To be honest I feel sorry for him as traumatized as he is. “Come work for the Inquisition. I will personally cover your debt to Gaspard.”

The man looks at me with shock. Finding his voice he says, “I hear the Inquisition is trying to make things right. I would be honored to join…and thank you.” 

“Find Lady Leliana, she will keep you safe.” I offer as we head off toward the ballroom.


	14. A Tough Choice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izzy has to decide who will lead Orlias... I used the tune of my favorite things for Sera's song....I did a recording of it as well but I think Sera's voice would be much more untrained than mine(I was a voice major and music teacher in my early career)....so I really tried to sound that way:) You can find the recording here ....http://www.thefiberofmybeing.net/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/seras-nobles-song-_mixdown.mp3

Upon entering the ballroom I try to head towards Florianne but Cullen stops me. “Thank the maker you’re back!” He exclaims worriedly. ”The Empress will begin her speech soon. What should we do?”

I know that if I catch the Duchess before she strikes nothing will change. Gaspard, Celene, and Briala will continue bickering and probably blame each other for the Venatori. I need the Duchess to show her hand. I know the risk is there that Celene could die. In some ways Celene has been too complacent, just playing the grand game. She knew of Gaspard’s plan and tried to turn it to her advantage and purged her lover’s alienage while bedding her. Her ex-lover is worse keeping the rivalry going by playing both sides against the middle. Gaspard isn’t perfect either but at least he doesn’t hide his intentions. He may have planned to take over the winter palace but he didn’t want to kill Celene just depose her. I find that I do believe him.

“The Duchess will try to assassinate the Celene personally. Wait for her to strike then grab her.” I order.

“As you command,” Cullen says quickly taking off to get into position.

The announcer comes forward. “Let all gathered attend! Her Imperial Majesty will address the court!”

“My friends,” the Empress announces. “We have lost much. We have each seen a child, a lover, a friend consigned to the flames. The darkness has closed in around us, but even now there is light. We must be that light! We must lead our people safely through these troubled times. We must be their guiding star. Tonight, the war dividing us must end.”

I notice Duchess Florianne has climbed the steps and is moving toward the Empress. I try to make my way quickly around the crowd trying to get to the other side of room.

I hear the Duchess speaking as I walk quickly toward the other side of the room trying not to alert the crowd. “My friends, we are here to witness a historic moment. A great change is coming for all of us. Isn’t it Gaspard?”

Breaking my gaze away from the Duchess I see Gaspard looking confused. 

“Florianne Stop!” I yell forgetting about the crowd. Gaspard realizing what is about to happen runs up the steps. We both reach Florianne at the same time but we are too late. She has fatally stabbed Celene. I look at him and nod as he pins Florianne’s hands behind her back. I drop to check on Celene but she is gone. I close her eyes and gently smooth her dress out before standing up and glaring at Florianne.

Florianne laughs. “Don’t be coy Gaspard! This went just as we planned! I did this for you brother!”

“Me? Have you gone mad?!” He shouts in anger and disgust.

“We owe the court one more show, your grace,” I announce sweetly to the struggling Florianne. “The eyes of every noble in the empire are upon you, your grace, and do remember to smile, my dear. This is your party you wouldn’t want them to think you’ve lost control.”

Florianne seems to remember herself. “Who wouldn’t be delighted to speak to you, Inquisitor?” She manages to say with only the slightest quiver in her voice. 

“I seem to recall you saying,” I pause for dramatic effect. “All I needed was to keep you out of the ballroom long enough to strike. After which you commanded a group of venatori to kill me bringing my marked hand to you as proof as it would make a wonderful gift for the master. You didn’t do this for Gaspard. You did it for Corypheus.”

I hear the collective horrified gasp of the entire gathering behind me.

“What a terrible guest you are interrupting your host,” Florianne sneers. “For Corypheus, Kill them!”

Chaos breaks loose as Venatori appear and start attacking. Gaspard is forced to let go of Florianne to defend himself. I realize he only has his personal dagger. So I take out one fighter and grab his sword. “Gaspard!” I yell over the fray. He looks toward me as I toss the blade to him. He nods gratefully, catching it before taking on another Venatori. I quickly cast barrier over us and move back to back with him fadeblade in hand.”

“Well this not what I expected,” Gaspard manages to grunt with a wicked smirk between sword strikes.

“Nor I,” I reply giving him a quick feral grin. As I take out another opponent.

Cullen comes running over. “We got this!” He says looking at Gaspard who nods in agreement. I call out to my team and we race out to the main entrance garden after Florianne. 

She starts talking about the great plan to destroy the empire for Corypheus’ rise to power. The Duchess has her arrow trained on me. Suddenly I see an arrow fly by me and Florianne drops from her perch into the garden fountain.

“Damn nobles talk too much,” Sera mutters, as more Venatori come out for a fight.

Over the din of the fighting I hear Sera singing a little song as she lets her arrows fly.

“Wines and smelly cheeses  
Gemmed doublets and breeches  
Pointed little slippers   
Headdresses of feathers  
Pasted on smiles hiding hate in their eyes  
These are the noble things that I despise  
Overly sweet desserts  
Ham of despair  
Pompous chest puffing   
What a waste of air  
Falsehoods, fake friendships   
Trying to be coy  
All the nobles should go to the void  
When the mask falls  
When control’s lost  
When they get real mad  
It fills me with joy to see them come unhinged  
The small people get revenge.”

I can’t help but grin hearing her vent her frustration in this way. Once the all the Venatori are dead we make our way back to the ballroom. I am stopped Vivienne, Josephine, and Leliana, who insist on helping me freshen up before being seen by the court. Thankfully my armor kept most of the mess off my dress. We did have to take the hem up as it had been torn but overall it works. Leliana fixes my hair and pats some powder on my face before she is satisfied. 

“There you look ravishing,” Vivienne says sweetly. “And you did make quite an impression on the Duke do be sure to use it to your advantage, my dear.”

“Yes, it does seem the Duke is quite taken with you,” Leliana teases.

“Although the Duke wouldn’t have been my first choice,” Josephine says sighing. “I understand that you needed to draw Florianne out it is too bad about Celene.”

I sigh looking at her. “It was a calculated risk and I lost. Now I’m sure Briala will blame Gaspard because Florianne was his sister.”

Vivienne hands me her glass of wine. “Here I think you need it.” She says with uncharacteristic compassion.

I look at her gratefully taking the glass and gulping down the contents. “Thank you, Vivienne.”


	15. The End of the Grand Ball

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izzy has chat with Gaspard and Briala, Dorian and Izzy scandalize the nobility....

I step out of the guest room we were using and head back to the ball room. The announcer rushes over to me. “The Duke and Ambassador Briala await you on the main balcony.” 

“Thank you,” I nod to the man as I make my way to the balcony where Briala and Gaspard are arguing. They don’t even notice my entrance they are so busy bickering.

“You’re wasting time trying to stir the nobility against me.” Gaspard says obviously exasperated. “We are at war!”

“I hardly have to stir them at all. Your sister murdered Celene! Everyone saw it!” Briala retorts angrily, “You are a traitor by association!”

“What do you hope to gain rabbit?” The Duke asks angrily, “You can’t claim Celene’s throne for yourself.”

“Maybe not,” Briala growls, “But I can keep it from you!”

“Enough!” I say loudly enough to startle them. Gaspard has the decency to look a bit ashamed. 

“My apologies, Inquisitor,” He says immediately. Briala just glowers at me.

“You’re finished meddling Briala, Gaspard will become emperor.” I state evenly looking at her daring her to challenge me.

“You think you can keep him in power? Really?” she asks sarcastically, “Will you sit by and hold his hand to fend off the accusations of the court? Be a lover at his side?”

I grin wickedly at her because I knew she would rise to the bait that I had carefully cultivated during the ball. “You killed ambassadors on both sides to draw out negotiations, playing both sides against the middle. You would have gotten away with it too had I not been looking for the Venatori. I found your missives.”

Briala huffs and crosses her arms. “Even if I did arrange such…accidents for the ambassadors, there’s nothing you can do. Lift a finger against me, and elves will rise up across the empire.”

I give her another feral grin. “Not once they find out you were sleeping with Celene when she burned the Halamshiral alienage.”

“She has you, rab-Ambassador,” He says correcting himself quickly.

“The important thing right now is for the empire to have stability. It’s up to you whether you wish to work with us or against us.” I state looking at Briala with a pleading glance. I am trying to give Briala a chance to work with Gaspard as I do see the value of what she can offer.

“You think you did this for the good of Orlais?” she snorts. “This is a grab for power. A child could see that.”

I shrug my shoulders looking at Gaspard. “You are so determined to act like a petulant child you fail to see the Inquisitor was offering you an olive branch, Briala.” Gaspard says regrettably. “You played the game well but you have lost. If you had relented, I would have had you remain ambassador, in spite of the fact I find you infuriating. As it is for your part in perpetuating this war, I think your death will bring years of security. I will have the Inquisitor help me find a suitable replacement for elven ambassador.” Gaspard looks over at me, “If you don’t mind doing such a task for me.”

“Of course,” I nod at him.

To say Briala looked shocked would be an understatement. “You would still have had an elven ambassador to speak for us?”

“Yes,” Gaspard says simply, “I see changes need to come as well.”

The guards come to take Briala away and she goes silently.

Once we are alone on the balcony I feel the need to say something, “Emperor, I apologize for the death of Celene...I’m also sorry…”

“I understand,” Gaspard interrupts me, “If you had not flushed my sister out into the open no one would have known of her treachery. You didn’t have any proof. I should have seen this but even I didn’t know. As for Florianne, she was a traitor by allying with Corypheus.”

Gaspard walks over to the nearby table and pours two glasses of wine handing me one. “I never thought I would be fighting by your side.” He grins roguishly. “I have to say you are vision when fighting and one skilled knight enchanter.” 

“That is high praise from the new Emperor, who is a chevalier and general of the Orlesian army,” I tease lightly.

“Please I think you can call me Gaspard now, we spilt blood together,” he says smiling.

“Deal, under one condition.” I say cheekily. “I realize around nobles and such we have to keep up appearances, so I call you Emperor or your grace. You will have to call me by my title Inquisitor, but in private I would prefer you call me Allana or Ally. That’s what my friends call me.”

“As you wish, Allana,” Gaspard replies trying out the name. “Just let me say officially that, we all owe you our lives. You have done both me and Orlais a deed that cannot be repaid. I will remember that. You have been a friend and I said before I am not man who forgets his friends. When the time comes I will bring the might of the Orlesian armies to fight with you against Corypheus.”

“Thank you, the inquisition appreciates Orlais’ support,” I offer respectfully.

“On a more personal note,” he says taking a drink, “I will be adding myself to what I am sure is a long list of suitors.”

“Is this a political move or personal one?” I ask curiously taking a sip of the wine. “After all I am in Orlais.” 

Gaspard laughs heartily. “Both,” he says honestly, “I realize that since we already have an alliance that it would make that all the stronger. But I have to admit I am intrigued by you.”

“And you don’t have a problem with me being a mage and an elf?” I ask curiously.

“I know it would take some time for more traditional nobles to entertain such an idea,” He admits, “But after spending so much time fighting with elves and mages by my side. Race or mage really doesn’t matter to me.”

I furrow my brow thoughtfully. “You called Briala rabbit though,” I note.

“I did,” Gaspard admits, “I shouldn’t have but to be honest. She is the only one I have used that derogatory term with for years.”

“She pissed you off that much,” I say unable to stop a giggle from escaping.

He grins at me ruefully. “Yes, I should have had better control than that.”

“Coming from the Dalish into human society, it took me a long time to quit thinking and saying shem.” I admit.

“What does shem mean exactly?” Gaspard asks curiously. “I don’t know much about elves outside of the city although I’ve heard them use the term as well.”

“Shem is short for the word Shemlen,” I explain. “The word itself isn’t derogatory it just means quick children (Shem meaning quick and len meaning child or children). I think it came into use when elves lived much longer lives. Though now it’s just slang that seems to have lost its meaning.” 

“I think I would like to hear more about the ancient elves if you would share what you know with me.” He says with obvious interest. “We know so little of the Dalish elves. It would be good to learn about some of the Dalish who live here in Orlais, but that is for another day.Come we must address the court and I would like to do it with my friend.” We set our glasses down and head back into the ballroom. “Stand with me.” Gaspard instructs. “We should speak to the people together.”

I nod in agreement and we take position where the Empress had addressed the people earlier.

“And so the crown falls to me,” Gaspard begins sadly, as the nobles assemble below us. “This is not the victory I hoped for. I wanted this moment to be filled with song, not with sorrow. I have always been a soldier and as every soldier knows, the difference between defeat and victory is how it is named. An enemy has struck the empire in its very heart. As your emperor, I promise justice. Orlais will not allow such atrocities…corruption, deceit, and murder… to go unchallenged. We will face this Corypheus. He will know the wrath of the lion.”

I’m seeing new side to Gaspard. He is a skilled orator as well and is rallying the nobles. I have to admit I am impressed. “We will fight shoulder-to-shoulder with the Inquisition,” Gaspard continues. “Together, we will send our enemy to the maker’s judgment.” Gaspard looks at me to continue.

“With your help, we will end this crisis and restore peace to Thedas.” I add.

“We have much work ahead,” Gaspard continues. “But that is for another day. Tonight, be at ease. Rest and prepare yourselves for the battle ahead.”

Once that is finished I leave to mingle as is expected. It seems everyone is asking for me and I have been declared the Belle of the Ball. Whatever that means, I don’t claim to understand all human customs. I put that to the back of my mind to ask Josephine about later. I head out to the balcony for a bit of air and quiet. 

But soon find that Morrigan has come to join me.“Here at last I find our absent hero, hidden away despite the efforts of all Orlais to find you.” She says evenly. “Gaspard drunkenly toasts in your honor, Deliverer from Darkness and other titles complimentary and awkwardly phrased.”

“Well I guess all of Orlais didn’t look too hard,” I jest. “Everyone suddenly wants to talk to me. You, at least, I’m glad to see as I wanted to thank you for your help earlier.”

Morrigan chuckles lightly. “Then I have happy news, as you shall be seeing a great deal more of me. By imperial decree, I have been named liaison to the Inquisition. Gaspard wishes to offer any and all aid to the one who supported his ascent to the throne. So here I am.”

“I had no idea you were interested in joining the Inquisition, Lady Morrigan.” I say slightly surprised.

“The assignment has been given to me, regardless of my personal interest,” She states evenly. “Gaspard never liked my attendance at court. I assume he wishes me as far from here as possible. Regardless, Corypheus is threat to Orlais and to myself, thus I am not opposed to the appointment.”

“Welcome to the Inquisition, Morrigan.” I offer politely.

“A most gracious response,” she replies her light tone belying her surprise. “I shall meet you, at Skyhold.” Not long after Morrigan leaves, Dorian finds me. 

“Things have calmed down for the moment,” He says coming to stand beside me. “You look lost in thought, are you alright?”

“Tonight has been very long,” I admit. “I was hoping there would be some way to save Celene.”

“There you go,” Dorian chides lightly, “thinking you can save everyone. Some people make bad choices…Don’t dwell.” I give Dorian a small smile.“What you need is a distraction. Shall we scandalize the nobles a bit more with a dance?” He grins wickedly.

“Why not they already named me Belle of Ball for whatever that’s worth,” I tease.

Heading back inside, Dorian has a chat with bards. We head to the dance floor. I hear the song start and know he really intends not to just dance with me but to dance the Antivan dance with me. I give him a shocked look and giggle. As I take my position my back to his chest with my arm raised and curled around his neck. The surprised gasps from the nobles make me snicker again. Dorian gives me a look reminding me that this is supposed to be an intense dance.

Dorian grabs my other hand settled at my waist and spins me out as he lets go of my hand I spin a few more times and come to swaying sensuously. Looking at him fiercely, I reach one hand out and teasingly beckon him with a finger. We walk around each other our gaze never breaking and my hand comes to rest on his chest as we complete another turn around each other. His eyes never leave my face as he pulls off his jacket tossing it to the side. Facing each other we take one large step toward each other and pose. He grins at me wickedly and I can’t help but to chuckle. He takes my hand and we step away from each other and pose again. As we turn our bodies to face each other again, we lock into another passionately intense gaze. I take his left and in mine and he spins me into him so my back it to his chest. We both take large step back posing again as my other hand goes to his shoulder and his comes to rest on my waist. As he takes a step to turn as I bend my leg and raise it over his thigh letting him turn me on one foot as the rest of my body curls around him. The gasps from everyone present tell me, we are in what looks to be a compromising position. I snicker inwardly and glancing over at Josephine. I have to say, she looks shocked. I bend back into a deep dip and from my upside down position, I see the emperor with a rather amused expression on his face. 

Dorian pulls me back into him tightly so we are face to face again and we start to move doing the footwork he taught me I kick up between his knees and he kicks up between mine. Our eyes never leaving each other’s as his gaze has pinned mine in place. He spins me to face front and we dance to the right. I kick out my right leg pulling it up to my head and hold the pose. Coming out of the pose he spins me twice before pulling me back into him. As I stand facing him again, I work the twisting footwork he taught me. It almost seems to shimmy my body for the audience. He stares at me passionately his eyes never leaving my face. If I didn’t know better I would have thought he was serious. Once again spins me away from him. When I am a full arm’s length away he gives a slight jerk and I stop spinning and turn to look at him. I jump turning to face him and bat his hand away. He spins facing away from me striking a pose. I walk up behind him running my hands up his chest and wrapping my thigh around his leg. He reaches down and strokes my thigh. Hearing the crowd murmur in surprise, I almost giggle again. Turning around I take a few steps back. Running my hands up over my swaying hips, he walks over to me. The audience probably seriously scandalized at the point lets out another collective gasp.

I notice that Gaspard has moved to the front of the crowd for a better view. As Dorian reaches me, I drop to one knee and he takes my face in his hand bringing back up to standing. I place the opposite hand on his shoulder. He spins me around his body and I drop into a dip along his side. Snaking an arm around my head he catches me. He gives me slight push back up to standing so my back is facing him again and brings both hands almost spanning my upper rib cage and breasts. There are a few shocked expletives that come from the crowd at this action. I start to walk forward and see Gaspard standing in front of me so I give him a cheeky smirk. I get roguish grin from him in return. Dorian steps forward grabbing both my arms stopping me from going any further which causes a titter to run through the crowd (as it looks like Dorian is keeping me from getting to Gaspard). Pulling me back he spins me around again so we are joined again in dance formation and our eyes meet. He steps back and I lay my leg along his outstretched one leaning into him as he runs one hand down from neck down my shoulder to my waist. I lean my upper body away from him as he does this eliciting more scandalized huffs from the crowd. We both straighten as he spins me out and we both pose smiling at our audience. Spinning back toward him, I move my hand quickly to his shoulder as he grasps my waist and picks me up so my weight is resting on his side. I kick out my outside leg as high as it will go and hold the pose. Turning me so that I am in front of him he sets me down on the floor dropping down to so that I am held by his arm just inches away from his beautiful mustached mouth. The moment is perfect. You could have heard a pin drop it was so quiet in the ballroom. 

Suddenly I hear a clap and then another one. I look over and Gaspard is applauding us. The other nobles quickly follow in suit. Dorian stands helping me rise with him and takes a bow. I follow in suit with a proper curtsy. The bards start playing again as Dorian and I leave the dance floor. Iron Bull walks up to Dorian grinning from ear to ear and claps him on the back as they go find more wine.

Gaspard comes to me thoughtfully grabbing two glasses of wine and offers one to me. “I have to say Inquisitor; you really know how to make a party memorable. You can even scandalize the nobility, while still charming them.” He chuckles heartily. 

I return the grin he is giving me. “I told you I had a great dance teacher,” I tease gesturing toward Dorian.


	16. Back at Skyhold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Revered mothers and suitors galore

No sooner do I get back to Skyhold and I am being besieged by suitors and the chantry. The chantry has sent a Revered Mother. Her job seems to be trying to cajole me into sending Leliana and Cassandra back to Orlais with them. I tell the revered mother that her request will have to wait until Corypheus is dealt with. When the revered mother tries to push with “for the sake of Thedas we ask you make this sacrifice.” 

I can’t help but look at her like she has a second head on her shoulders and reply, “If Corypheus isn’t defeated a new Divine will be the least of our problems, Revered Mother.”

I get sharp look from Josephine, but she nods gracefully. She pulls me away and saying, “This will have to be settled later. The Inquisitor has only just returned and has important business to attend to.”

Once the revered mother is gone, Josephine turns to look at me. “Don’t let this distract you from your victory at Halamshiral. I am elated you handled the game with so much grace.”

“To be honest it was fun,” I admit smiling, “I just don’t want to do every day.”

Important business ended up being meeting the first ten suitors, making out the schedule to set up appointments to meet the rest of the suitors. It also seems that Corypheus and his followers are headed the Arbor Wilds. There are many elven ruins there, but Morrigan points out the temple of Mythal. A place she attempted to go and take an eluvian. Eluvians are rare now, the fact that Morrigan has one and took me through it was special indeed. If there is one at the Temple, it needs to be protected from Corypheus. I’m not sure what the combined power of an eluvian and the orb could do, but I realize it could very dangerous in the wrong hands.

After meeting a few of the suitors who have arrived, I leave them to head to Herald’s Rest and met with Iron Bull. I will need to start weeding out the suitors and I need the spy’s take, as he can pick up on things I would miss. Entering the tavern Bull and Dorian wave me over to their table and have thoughtfully had a glass of my favorite wine ready for me. 

“You know,” Bull says conversationally. “I’ve got no problems with Orlesians, but Halamshiral was a mess. At least under the Qun, you don’t get everyone tripping on each other’s dicks while the country goes to crap.”

I can’t help but snort at his idiom. “You’ve got a way with words, Bull.” Dorian just smirks.

“I do what I can,” replies Bull grinning.

“Yes, marvelous business, the Winter Palace.” Dorian says with another smirk. “An Empress dead, her replacement in your pocket…a charming fellow, though still a bit of a thug.”

“Oh, I don’t know. I kinda liked him,” I tease. “He was much more straight-forward than any other Orlesian there.”

“Well, he obviously enjoys scandalizing the nobility as much as I do,” Dorian quips. “I think I like him more on that alone. All this dancing, politics and murder makes me a bit homesick.”

“That’s something you’d like to do more often, then?” I ask with a smirk.

Dorian leans into the table facing me, with a feral grin. “Watch as you twist an entire empire around your little finger? Yes, please! Of course that only leaves Tevinter, and it wouldn’t work as well there.” 

“No?” I ask curiously, “Why not?”

“Our dances are so much more intense. If the evening lacks a murder, we sniff and call it a bore.” He says mirth sparkling in his eyes.

“Ah, but there was murder,” I tease, “So I take it that it wasn’t a bore then?”

Dorian snorts briefly as he grins. “I hope you tried the ham they were serving, by the way. It tasted of despair. Fascinating.”

“Why on Thedas would you want to taste that?” I can’t help but to giggle at him. 

Bull just shakes his head with a smile.

“So Bull, what are your thoughts on suitor 1?” I ask curiously, pulling out the suitor list, I had stashed in my pocket.

“Pompous ass,” Bull replies. “He is sincere in his support of the Inquisition but would try to pin you under his thumb. He has definite prejudices about mages and elves.”

“Well that one needs to be dropped off the list then,” Dorian says smirking.

“Suitor 2?” I ask looking at Bull.

“Seems honest, has respect for you. Not sure about his take on the inquisition though. I need to study him further.” Bull replies quickly.

“You gave them numbers?” Dorian asks curiously with a hint of humor.

“There are 50, Dorian,” I say with sigh. “I am not even going to try to remember all their names until we whittle the list down I say looking at the parchment in front of me.”

Dorian grabs the wine bottle and refills my glass. “I think you are going to need way more wine for this. May I see?” He asks gesturing to the parchment. I nod sliding it over to him.

“Emile De Launcet?” Dorian snickers, “Seriously he’s the 5th son of a minor noble and bit of an idiot. They can’t be serious. He has a child with bar wench.”

“Yea he was suitor 4,” Bull notes, “not the sharpest dagger in the belt.”

“Off the list, he goes then,” I say quickly as Dorian draws a line through his name.

“Oh now, this is interesting, Emperor Gaspard is on the list,” Dorian says looking at me. 

I can’t help but smirk. “The Emperor did say that I intrigued him. I really didn’t think he meant it at the time he was quite drunk. What number is he?”

“45, why?” Dorian says giving me hard look.

“I actually like Gaspard. We have become friends. I will be looking forward to his visit in 4 weeks. I am meeting with 10 suitors a week.” I answer honestly.

Dorian looks a bit surprised. It almost looks as if he wants to say something but he just goes back to the list.


	17. Emperor Gaspard

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the emperor makes an impromptu visit to skyhold

I am in the sparring ring practicing with Iron Bull. We are practicing some new moves we came up with putting his strength and my magic together. When Sera turned down Bull’s ideas to create mayhem by launching her into the air, I decided that it could work. Dorian is watching as he finds it entertaining. 

“Ready?” Bull asks. I give him a look of concentration readying my spell as I nod. He launches me into the air forward and I somersault twice. As I come down, I cast a mind blast and land gracefully on my feet. 

“I think that is highest toss yet, Bravo!” Dorian yells grinning.

“Let’s try it with the dummies!” I say grinning at Bull. He grins in reply and grabs two sparring dummies as I grab one. Once we have placed 5 of them in circle we take position again. Bull launches me in the air and I somersault again landing in the middle of the circle I quickly cast a winters grasp around me as Bull comes running forward and then I cast a barrier for extra safety. Bull takes his ax and smashes the dummies around me grinning ferally. Once they are destroyed he gives a hearty laugh, “Best one yet boss!” 

“The requisitions officer is going have kittens because we destroyed so many sparring dummies today,” I grin at him.

“Ah, he’ll get over it.” Bull retorts.

I hear clapping and look over toward Dorian. The Emperor is here? Why? Walking over the edge of the sparring arena, I greet him, “Your grace, I wasn’t expecting you for another week. To what do I owe the pleasure?” 

“I found I had some time. But please continue I would like to watch you practice,” Gaspard says smiling.

“Very well, your grace,” I nod at him respectfully and head back into the middle of the sparring ring. 

“Let’s work back to back,” Bull says grinning as he grabs more sparring dummies.  
I nod in agreement, helping him place the dummies. Then I take my position at his back. I work on parries and thrusts with my fadeblade protecting Bull’s back as he swings his axe protecting mine.

“Now Bull!” I instruct. Bull crouches slightly and I turn around to grab his harness jumping up to flip myself to up on to his horns. Casting a circular wall of ice, Bull whirls around in a circle smashing the dummies just behind my spell. The effect is devastation. By the end of his whirlwind spin the dummies are icy splinters. Placing my feet on his shoulders, I drop toward the ground going into a somersault. I come out of the roll and standing up, doing a round off going into a series of backflips before I stop at the edge of the arena.

“Now you’re just showing off,” Dorian teases. 

I grin at him wickedly, “why don’t you come join us then and put me in my place?”

“I would but I think the Emperor wishes to spar,” Dorian says with a raised eyebrow looking at Gaspard.

“If you don’t mind indulging me,” Gaspard says with a grin.

“Of course, Emperor,” I try to say without smirking and failing horribly. Gaspard grins wickedly at me. Grabbing a practice sword and shield he heads into the arena. I grab one of the many staffs and join him.

“A staff?” He says curiously as he starts to circle me.

“The Clan had me learn to spar with many weapons as well as teaching me knight enchanter techniques, we call them the Dirth'ena Enasalin,” I explain as we circle each other.

“Very pragmatic,” Gaspard says as he lunges forward. I block his strike with the staff and he steps back again. He is testing me as he goes into a flurry of strikes to see if I can block them.

“You can quit testing me now, Gaspard,” I tease lightly.

A smirk crosses his face as he barks out a laugh. “I should have known that you would pick up on that,” he says moving forward to attack in earnest. 

I block the attack spinning to come in low. I hit his calf. He grins as it hits. “I’m glad to see you aren’t afraid to damage the emperor.” He teases.

“Well if I damage you, your grace,” I say breathlessly as I block and parry. “I can always heal you back up.”

Gaspard comes forward with hard blow as I block with the staff it snaps. I have to give it to the man, he is strong. He steps back trying giving me a moment to grab another weapon but I shrug it off and twirl the two ends in my hands. I point one broken end at him with a feral grin and beckon him forward. He grins wickedly and we continue sparring. Finally Gaspard starts using his shield for offense. I am glad as I know this is that I need practice with. I do pretty well against the first couple attacks. I avoid most of them by moving out of the way. He is definitely stronger than me but I am faster. I do feel myself tiring though as he is fresher than I am. He throws all his weight behind a shield bash and knocks me back. I drop the staff pieces and do a back somersault coming to my feet.   
Seeing me unarmed he pauses, I drop into a grappling stance and beckon him again with a finger smirking. He drops the shield and the sword, grinning roguishly. Gaspard lunges forward to grab me and I jump high doing a somersault in the air over him, landing behind him. I try to turn around quickly, but I am too slow. Just as I am getting my stance back he tackles me to ground. We grapple on the ground for a bit each of us looking for a weakness in the other. 

Gaspard pins me. “You’re getting tired, Allana,” He says teasingly.

I chuckle. “Well I was sparring before you got here.” I say finding an advantage and flipping us so is he under me.

“True enough,” he agrees working shifting his weight to flip. I can’t hold against his strength and he flips me under him again. He pulls both of my wrists together up over my head. His mouth is just inches from mine. I wonder briefly what it would be like to kiss him. Then I realize he is sitting on my hips but my legs are free. Bringing my legs up before he recognizes my intent, I wrap them over his shoulders using my leg strength I push him back. Because he has my wrists I am pulled up over him. In his surprise his hands drop my wrists and we hit the ground with a thud. I am sitting on his chest with my knees holding down his shoulders.

We are both breathing heavily by this time I shift myself to allow him to breathe easier. He lets out a hearty laugh. I can’t help myself as it seems his laugh is quite infectious, I start giggling uncontrollably. Shifting my knees back I lean forward on my palms still laughing. “Well fought, Allana,” He manages to say between chuckles. “I should remember your reach and flexibility, as it is quite impressive,” He says lowering his tone suggestively. 

I blush at his tone before cheekily replying, “You’re not so bad yourself, Emperor.”

I stand up offering him a hand to stand. He accepts my hand and I help him to stand, but instead of releasing it, he pulls me over to him. “I hope to be able to spend more time with you during my visit.” He says searching my face. 

My stomach flutters a bit for the first time since I realized I liked Dorian, much to my surprise. Blushing lightly, I reply, “I would like that too.”  
 


	18. Dinner with an Emperor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gaspard tries to get the know Izzy better

When I get back to my room, Nadia and Josephine are waiting for me. “There has been a change in plans, Ally,” Josephine says as I take off my armor. The Emperor has asked to have a private dinner with you. 

“If he is here as a suitor, He will have to obey the same rules as the rest, Emperor or no.” I remind her as I walk behind the privacy screen and start to undress. “However, let his grace know, I would be happy to have dinner with him.”

“As you wish, Ally,” Josephine says curtly. I feel sorry for her having to be the one to deliver such a message. I also realize I still have more suitors to meet with and I can’t show partiality to any at this point. Gaspard will just have to accept that. 

I hear Nadia in my closet. “Would you like the green dress or the yellow one?” She asks.

“Let’s go with the green one tonight, Nad,” I answer as I wash my hair.

“The green one looks so good on you,” she agrees. 

“Mind if I join the party?” I hear Dorian call up the steps.

“If you don’t mind doing my hair,” I call back splashing water. Dorian can help me get ready I realize, so Nadia can leave early. Maybe she can spend some time with the nice elven soldier she told me about.

“Nadia,” I say with a smile in my voice. “Why don’t you take the night off?”

“Sure thing, Ally,” She says excitedly as she races out of the room.

“So the Emperor of Orlais is courting you?” Dorian asks conversationally, with a hint of mirth in his voice.

“I suppose so. I didn’t really think he would follow through with it.” I reply evenly although I am feeling some butterflies in my stomach.

“And you are going to make him wait it out, while you meet the other suitors?” He asks slightly astonished.

“I can’t choose any favorites at this point, Dorian. The whole idea behind this was to get rid of them all, remember?” I point out. “I like Gaspard as a friend but I can’t let the fact that he is Emperor, and someone I consider a friend to cloud my judgement. Besides it’s not like he would marry me. I really don’t want to marry anyone.” 

“Oh well, then you should probably tell him, if you are friends,” He says seriously. “I know you don’t have much experience with relationships and romance. You don’t want the Emperor angry at you.”

“I thought about that. I will tell him at dinner tonight,” I explain as I get out of the tub.

“Good,” He sighs with relief. “It will give him the opportunity to bow out gracefully then.”

I pull on a the dress that Nadia had thrown over the screen. “Why so concerned about him courting me?” I ask curiously, furrowing my brow as I look at him. Emotions flit so quickly across his face I can’t comprehend them. He walks over to my vanity and picks up a comb, gesturing for me to sit.

“Because, the emperor is a powerful man,” He says slowly, as he takes my chin in his hand turning my head to face him. “And if he or anyone hurts you, I may have to hurt them.” He adds gently brushing his thumb across my cheek.

For a moment my heart leaps, but then I remember and school my emotions. “Thanks Falon, it’s good to know that you care.” I say giving him a quick hug.

“Let’s get you ready for dinner,” Dorian says quickly changing the subject.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

As I make my way to the smaller dining room Bull meets up with me to escort to dinner. Gaspard looks a bit surprised to see Bull. “I was told you would have a chaperon, Allana,” Gaspard says lightly. “I will say I’m surprised that your chaperon is The Iron Bull.”

I shoot Bull a grin before replying. “He’s the best chaperon a girl could ask for.” 

Bull settles himself in the corner of the room as walk over to the table. Gaspard walks over the table and pulls out the chair. “Here you are, my lady,” he gestures for me to sit and pours the wine before taking his seat.

“Thank you,” I say as I lift my glass to take a sip. “I should explain,” I offer as I set the glass back down. 

“Please do, I admit I am curious about this whole arrangement.” Gaspard says leaning into the table.

“Well, about a month before the party at the Winter Palace, requests from nobles for my hand in marriage started coming. Realizing I could not ignore this, I decided to allow the suitors to come to Skyhold.” I explain. “I told them, if I found someone I love and provided I survive the war with Corypheus. I will marry. I was not willing to bargain my hand in marriage for political gain. I feel I have given enough to the Inquisition. I cannot return to the clan. I am trying to fit in a world that is so different from mine. Some ways of doing so are easier than others. I needed a way to satisfy the needs of protocol but also do what was right for me. So that is how I ended up with 50 potential suitors. I’m sorry you got caught up in this mess.” I take a moment to catch my breath as I realized I had spoken in one breathe.

Gaspard looks a bit astonished but then his expression changes to comprehension. “I can understand why you would do this. It’s pragmatic and clever,” Gaspard says gently, “It must be a bit of culture shock to find out that humans sometimes only marry for political gain. To be thrust into a position like this must be difficult to say the least. To be honest, when my wife was killed many years ago, I had not thought to court or marry again.”

“Thank you for understanding,” I say appreciatively. “If you wish to withdraw from the suitors, I would understand.” I lower my eyes to my plate and push my food around feeling a bit foolish. Although, I still love Dorian, I have to admit I do like Gaspard. If anything finding a friend outside of the Inquisition is refreshing.

“Don’t be silly,” Gaspard says lightly, “I was serious when I said you do intrigue me, Alanna. I do enjoy your company. If anything I can use this as an excuse to see a real friend, if you don’t mind me taking advantage of the situation that way. My duties don’t leave me much time in the way of having real friendships.”   
I look up at him giving him a small smile. I feel like he was reading my mind.

“I do however have a question for you,” He says curiously.

“Yes?” I ask.

“You have spoken twice now of your clan.” He explains. “You say you cannot go back. Why?”

I take the wineglass and drain it. “I am going to need a lot more wine to be able to explain it.”

Gaspard pours me another glass. “If it’s too sensitive a subject, we can move onto another something else.”

“No,” I say decisively, “it’s time that I talked about it. The only person I really talked about with is Dorian.” After taking another gulp of the wine, I begin, “I made a bad decision.” I explain the trouble with Wycombe and the decisions I made to try to help my clan. I also explain how my decision to try diplomacy ended up with my clan being killed.

Once I finish with my tale. Gaspard sits silently as I push back the pinpricks of tears starting behind my eyes. I take shaky breathe and drain my glass again. He refills it.

As he hands it back to me he speaks. “There is nothing I can say that will make that better. All I can say is that I’m sorry for your loss. I’m sorry…you lost your clan. My decisions have not always worked out either. The Winter Palace shows that we can only do what we can with the information we have. But from what I’ve seen you have made a life for yourself and have friends who care about you.” He gestures over to Iron Bull.

“I am lucky that way aren’t I?” I say with small smile. “I’ve also found a friend in you as well.”


	19. Adamant

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izzy deals with the debacle at Adamant

I have met with all the suitors finally, in between trips to the Western Approach where I dealt with blood mage wardens and their new Venatori advisor, along with securing a keep and dealing with darkspawn. We have whittled down the suitors to 6. Strangely enough Gaspard hasn’t withdrawn but he has pushed nothing and seems to be comfortable with our friendship. Upon approaching Adamant, I am surprised to see him waiting for us with a contingent of chevaliers.  
“I thought you could use some extra help Inquisitor,” He greets me with a smile. “These chevaliers are at your disposal.”

To say I’m a bit stunned would be an understatement. I quickly school my face. “I thank you, your grace. This is most thoughtful as we don’t know what we will be facing in Adamant.” 

“I wish to help as you are fighting for Orlais and all of Thedas,” Gaspard says smiling. “The chevaliers await your orders.”

I nod in understanding. “Chevaliers, back up the Inquisition soldiers,” I command. “Once the fort is breached and we have foothold on the battlements follow the soldiers. After that, Commander Cullen will direct you to where you are needed. I will not lie to you there may be demons or abominations among the wardens. As we understand the warden mages are bound to Corypheus. However there may be some warden fighters who are sympathetic to our cause. If they declare themselves send them to Commander Cullen.” 

“You command well,” Gaspard says appreciatively, “you don’t sugar coat and you tell them what they are up against and what is expected.”

“Well, I have had some practice,” I tease lightly with a small smile looking over at Cullen. “Anyway I thank you again. Your help is most welcome.”

Gaspard looks at me thoughtfully for a moment. Then his face changes to slightly anxious and he reaches to gently touch my arm. “Please be safe and come back out of there. I wouldn’t want to have to miss my…friend. I’m going help Commander Cullen with breaching the walls.” He turns and quickly walks away. I’m left wondering for a moment what that was all about but there isn’t time to ponder as Cullen is making ready to breach the gates.

“He cares about you,” Iron Bull states as my small party walks up to me. 

“We’ll have to discuss it later,” I point out blushing lightly, as the battering ram is pushed into place.

“It looks like they are ready,” notes Dorian looking at the battlements.

“Well, Bianca’s excited,” Varric adds dryly.

There wasn’t time to do much of anything except run from fight to fight clearing the battlements for the soldiers until we got inside where the ritual was actually taking place. After talking to Warden Commander Clarel, she questions her decision and Livius Erimond can’t wait to bring out Corypheus’ archdemon. Clarel seeing what she would have ended up serving takes off after the Venatori mage with a murderous vengeance. We go after her knowing she will need help with the dragon and Erimond. Clarel gave her life to strike a blow at the archdemon. Declaring she will never serve the blight. However, the old fortress has taken about all it can and it starts crumbling. My hand starts to flare as I fall and suddenly I stop and hit the ground.

“Where are we?” I look over and see Stroud but he is not speaking. “We were falling.” I realize it’s Hawke speaking and look over at her. “Are we dead?” she asks.

“No,” Stroud answers, “the inquisitor opened another rift and we fell in. I believe we are in the fade.”

“The fade looked much different the last time I was here,” Hawke responds curiously.

“The first time I entered the fade, it looked like a lovely castle filled with gold and silks,” Dorian quips. “I met a marvelous desire demon as I recall. We chatted and ate grapes before he attempted to possess me. Perhaps the difference is that we are here physically. This is no one’s dream.”

“The stories say you walked out of the fade at Haven, was it like this?” Hawke asks curiously.

“I don’t know. I still don’t remember what happened the last time I did this,” I answer honestly.

“Well,” Hawke says, “Whatever happened at Haven, we can’t assume we’re safe now. That huge demon was on the other side of that rift Erimond was using, and there could be others.”

“Oh, this is shitty!” Iron Bull growls. “I’ll fight whatever you give me, Boss, but nobody said nothing about getting dragged through the ass end of demon town.”

“In our world the rift the demons came through was nearby, in the main hall. Can we escape the same way?” Stroud asks thoughtfully.

“Let’s find out,” I say forcing some cheerfulness into my voice. I can see the rift in the distance. “There, let’s go.”

“Is this really what it’s like when you people dream?” Varric asks astonished, “how do you people ever sleep? Remember last time we ended up in the fade Hawke?”

“I remember the lot you of being tempted by demons,” Hawke replies dryly.

“Well, we got better. Sort of.” Varric says hastily.

“Hey chief,” Bull says in Krem’s voice. “Let’s join the Inquisition! Good fights for a good cause!”

“I don’t know Krem,” Bull answers as himself, “I hear there are demons.”

“Ah, don’t worry about the demons, chief” Bull goes back into Krem’s voice. “I’m sure we won’t see many.”

Iron Bull mumbles incoherently for a moment and then says “Asshole!!!” I look over at him wondering if my large friend has lost his mind.

“Everyone,” Bull announces, “If I get possessed, feint on my blind side then go low. Cullen says I leave myself open.”

“I’ll bear that in mind,” Varric says dryly.

As we make our way forward we come upon someone that seems to be waiting for us. It looks to be Divine Justinia but it can’t be or can it?

“By the maker!” Stroud exclaims, “Could that be…”

“I greet you Warden, and you, Champion,” The woman says.

“Divine Justinia?” I ask curiously. “Back at Haven I saw…or I thought I saw…How can you be here?”

“She’s not,” Stroud says firmly, “I fear what we face is a spirit…or a demon.”

“You think my survival impossible but here you stand alive in the fade yourselves,” she says practically. “In truth proving my existence either way would require time we do not have.”

“Really, how hard is it to answer a question?” Hawke quips, “I’m human and you are…”

“Here to help you,” The Divine/spirit finishes. “You do not remember what happened at the temple of sacred ashes, Inquisitor.”

“That’s right but the real Divine would have no way of knowing I’d been made Inquisitor,” I counter cunningly.

“I know because I have examined memories like yours, stolen by the demon that serves Corypheus.” The Divine says unperturbed. “It is the nightmare you forget upon waking. It feeds off memories of fear and darkness, growing fat upon the terror. The false calling that terrified the wardens into making such grave mistakes? It’s work.”

“I would gladly avenge the insult this nightmare has dealt my brethren,” Stroud says angrily.

“You will have your chance, Brave Warden,” The Divine replies. “This place of darkness is its lair.”

“Corypheus seems to have a lot of demons at his disposal. How does he command so many?” I muse thoughtfully.

“I know not how he commands his army of demons.” The Divine replies honestly, “his power may come from the blight itself. But the nightmare serves willingly, for Corypheus has brought much terror into the world. He was one of the Magisters who released the first blight onto the world, was he not? Every child’s cry as an archdemon circles, every dwarf’s whimper in the deep roads the nightmare has fed well.”

“The big demon Erimond was trying to bring through?” I spit angrily.

“Yes,” the divine concurs.

“It’s nearby?” I ask.

“Yes,” she replies again.

“Well, shit!” I say wryly.

“When you entered the fade at Haven, the demon took a part of you. Before you do anything else you must recover it.” The Divine advises. “These are you memories, Inquisitor.” She gesture to the swirling green orbs over the water that immediately turn into wisps.

It seems we have to fight them and they turn into orbs again. Walking up to them the mark flares and I hold the mark over them. My head spins as the memory comes back. I hear Corypheus bring forth the sacrifice, he says much like I heard at the Temple of Sacred Ashes. Not learning anything new here, I note as I walk to the next swirling orb. As I absorb the next orb, I hear the Divine "why are you doing this? You of all people?" Well that’s different. I walk to next orb and hear myself "what’s going on here?" Ok I knew I said that from before. 

I head over to the 4th orb and as I absorb it I’m filled with pain. It wracks my head. The memory unfolds in front of me. The Divine is being held by magic as before but I can see wardens are the ones holding her. They have stern looks on their faces. This means Corypheus started the calling in advance before the conclave. I shudder at the realization. As I hear Corypheus speak “now is hour of our victory.”

“Why are you doing this? You of all people?” The Divine asks the wardens. I see Corypheus walk toward the Divine with the orb. “Keep the sacrifice still,” He commands. He raises the orb towards the Divine and she cries out, “Someone help me!” Whatever this orb is doing to the Divine is seems to be weakening her as Corypheus manically grins. The doors burst open and I come through, “What’s going on here?!” I shout…not as a question nice and sweet as was shown before but more like a demanding, protective shout. My expression isn’t one of curiosity as before but one of concern. 

The Divine uses the interruption to knock the orb from Corypheus’ hand and it rolls toward me. I reach down and pick it up. I grimace in pain as it attaches to my hand. Corypheus half growls, half yells in anger and races toward me. The orb and everything around me flashes white and I close my eyes against the brightness. I shake my head coming out of the vision.

“So your mark did not come from Andraste. It came from the orb Corypheus used in his ritual.” Stroud says almost accusingly.

“Corypheus intended to rip open the veil, use the anchor to enter the fade, and throw open the doors of the Black City. Not for the old god, but for himself. When you disrupted his plan the orb bestowed the anchor upon you instead.” The Divine in front of us explains.

“I never though Andraste did this. I did this myself, through my own actions, no maker required.” I say partially relived both because I have an answer and that everyone else saw it too. I don’t have to explain it thankfully.

“And now you may be certain,” the Divine says simply. “You cannot escape the nightmare until you regain all that it took from you. You have recovered some of yourself but now it knows that you are here. You must make haste. I will prepare the way ahead.” With that she just disappears. I turn around to see Hawke shaking her head.

“Something troubles you, Hawke?” Stroud asks concerned.

“I wondered if you might be concerned about the Grey Wardens holding the Divine in that vision. Their actions led to her death.” Hawke says sadly.

“I assume Corypheus had taken their minds as we have seen him do before.” Stroud says firmly. “Come we can argue about it after we escape this dark place.”

“Oh I intend to,” Hawke says a bit savagely.

“I’ve never met the Divine,” Varric says thoughtfully. “You think that was really her?”

“Well, I have no idea,” Dorian quips. “If it is a spirit, it isn’t acting like one. No demon would have been so helpful without asking for something in return.”

“That’s great and all,” Iron Bull cuts in. “But the nightmare is the thing currently scaring the shit outta me.”

As we continue walking down the path the nightmare starts to talk to us. I ignore him the best I can just focusing on the task at hand. The others however don’t seem to be as focused.

“The Qunari will make a lovely host for one of my minions or perhaps I’ll ride his body myself.” The nightmare jeers at bull.

“I’d like to see you try.” Bull grumbles savagely.

“Greetings Dorian…it is Dorian isn’t it? For a moment, I mistook you for your father.” The nightmare quips meanly.

“Rather uncalled for,” Dorian says somewhat facetiously.

“Once again Hawke is in danger because of you Varric. You found the red lyrium. You brought Hawke here…” the nightmare accuses.

“Just keep talking, smiley,” Varric quips. The nightmare laughs.

“Warden Stroud, how it must feel to devote your whole life to the wardens, only to watch them fall? Or worse to know that you were responsible for their destruction? When the next blight comes will they curse your name?” The nightmare asks cruelly.

“With the maker’s blessing, we will end this wretched beast.” Stroud declares.

“Did you think you mattered, Hawke? Did you think anything you ever did mattered?” The nightmare asks maliciously. “You couldn’t even save your city? How can expect to strike down a god? Fenris is going to die. Just like your family and everyone you ever cared about.”

“Of course a fear demon would know where to hurt us most. We must ignore it.” Hawke says pragmatically.

We continue making our way through fighting wisps, shades, demons and fear creatures that look different to each of depending on what our fears are. I have to admit the spiders are scary looking but they go down easily. We meet with the divine again and there are more memories to be had this time after we kill the creatures blocking the memories and I collect the memories scene unfolds adding more to the story.

“This is the breach in Haven.” I note, “This is how we…I escaped.” I see the steep rocky crags and remember climbing up them as the fear creatures come after us.

The Divine is at the top coaxing me to hurry reaching her hand out to me she shouts “The demons!” Then I am at the top and we are running for the rift. “Keep running!” I yell urging her to move faster. I slow down as I hear her scream. Turning around I reach for the Divine as she is being pulled back away from the rift by the creatures. I grab her hand and tug. 

She looks up at me and says “Go!” as she releases my hand and is taken away. I step back and turn toward the rift jumping in. I come to shaking my head to clear away the vision.

“It was you…They thought it was Andraste sending me from the fade but it was the Divine behind me…and then you…she died.”

“Yes,” the Divine says sadly.

“So this creature is simply a spirit.” Stroud says quietly.

“I think we all knew that was the case, Warden.” Hawke says with arrogance.

“I am sorry if I disappoint you,” the Divine spirit says to Hawke.

Hawke’s expression softens as she looks at the compassionate spirit. Then the spirit starts to glow and the Divine’s body is changed into a glowing body of light. She floats up into the air. 

“Are you memory of the Divine? A reflection?” I ask curiously.

“If that is the story you wish to tell,” She answers, “it is not a bad one.”

“What we do know is that the mortal Divine perished at the temple, thanks to the grey wardens,” Hawke says angrily.

“As I said, the grey wardens responsible for the crime were under the control of Corypheus.” Stroud retorts. “We can discuss this further once we return to Adamant.”

“Yes, Adamant, where the Inquisition faces an army of demons raised by the wardens.” Hawke quips back sarcastically.

“How dare you judge us?” Stroud demands raising his voice, “You tore Kirkwall apart and started the mage rebellion!”

“To protect innocent mages, not madmen drunk on blood magic!” Hawke retorts angrily. “Even without the influence of Corypheus, the wardens go too far. They need to be checked.”

“The wardens could still be useful,” Dorian says thoughtfully. “What if Corypheus conjures another blight? You never know.” Bull nods in agreement.

“I don’t know what to tell you,” Varric says honestly. “There are a few good ones, but an awful lot of the wardens I’ve known went crazy.”

“Now is not the time. We’ve other things to worry about like a giant fear demon.” I chide them for bickering like len. They all look at me and have the decency to look ashamed. Then fear creatures start dropping from rocks making that creepy screeching sound they like to make. 

“The nightmare has found us,” The spirit announces as she disappears.

Stroud and Hawke look at each other and nod. “Form up!” Stroud says decisively.

“I’m with you,” Hawke says firmly.

We take out the creatures quickly. “I suppose we should follow the Divine,” Dorian notes. “Whatever she is, she is our way out of here.” 

We fight our way through some stronger demons I can see the glow from the Divine’s spirit or memory (I’m not really sure which) leading us forward. As we draw close she says “You must get through the rift, inquisitor. Get through and slam it shut with all your strength. That will banish the army of demons…and exile this creature to the farthest reaches of the fade.” 

As we travel along I see the cavern opens. “The rift, we are almost there,” Hawke says with obvious relief.

“Great Hawke, why not just dare the old gods to try and stop you?” Varric quips.

We walk into the fear demons lair and there is a huge, ginormous creepy spider thing with a demon in front of it. We all stare at it in amazement and fear. Then I hear the spirit speak, “If you would, please tell Leliana, I am sorry. I failed you too. She floats toward the massive creature and the demon. She has golden lightning strikes radiating from her body. One hits the demon knocking it down as she heads for the massive many legged creature behind it. Suddenly there is bright flash of light; I turn my head away from the blinding brilliance. When my vision returns the spirit and the massive creature are nowhere to be seen just the demon awaits us. We take down the demon, although I have to admit it’s not an easy fight. He’s a strong one. As we run to the rift we are split by the massive creature returning I had sent Dorian, Varric and Iron Bull ahead. They made it I breathe in relief. Stroud, Hawke and I are left standing with a giant spiderlike creature between us and the rift.

“We need to clear a path!” Stroud yells over the creature’s growls.

“Go!” Hawke command decisively, “I’ll cover you!”

“No!” Stroud argues, “You were right. The grey wardens caused this. A warden must…”

“A warden must help them rebuild!” Hawke finishes, “that’s your job! Corypheus is mine.”

They both look at me waiting for me decide. Fen Harel’s ass! I know whoever is left behind will most likely die! I have to close that rift! I try to think quickly. The wardens were the ones who captured Corypheus in the first place. Hawke tried to kill him before but failed somehow. “Stroud!” His name creaks painfully from my throat. As I know I am most likely delivering a death sentence. 

He nods, “Inquisitor, it has been an honor.” He races toward the creature with a battle cry. “For the wardens!” 

As he strikes at the creature giving us precious time to escape, I take one last look hoping he can make it through but finally I jump into the rift. As I come out I tumble to ground picking myself up I see our soldiers still fighting demons along with help from the remaining grey wardens. Angrily I raise my hand with the mark twisting my wrist commanding the power within to kill the demons before raising it to the rift itself and slamming it closed. Everyone is thrown back by the blast. Once the rift is closed the cheering starts all around. Hawke walks up to me. “She was right without the nightmare to control them, the mages are free, and Corypheus loses his demon army. Though as far as they’re concerned, the inquisitor broke the spell with the blessing of the maker.”

“The people need something to believe in,” I say pragmatically.

“I agree they are terrified let them believe in the legend. No need to feed anymore fear demons.” Hawke says smiling.

“Inquisitor, the archdemon flew off as soon as you disappeared.” A messenger informs me. “The venatori magister is unconscious but alive. Cullen thought you might wish to deal with him yourself. As for the wardens, those who weren’t corrupted helped us fight the demons.”

One of the wardens comes forward. “We stand ready to help make up for Clarel’s…tragic mistake. Where is Stroud?”

“Warden Stroud died striking a blow against a servant of the blight.” I announce sadly, “We will honor his sacrifice, and remember how he exemplified the ideals of the grey wardens. Even as Corypheus and his servants tried to destroy you all from within.”

“Inquisitor, we have no one left of significant rank,” the man says bewildered. “What do we do now?”

“You stay and do whatever you can to help,” I command. “Stroud died for the ideals of the wardens. In war, victory, and we are still at war. Do you believe the wardens can still help?”

“I do, your worship.” The man answers firmly.

“You’re still vulnerable to Corypheus and possibly his venatori, but there are plenty of demons that need killing.” I say firmly knowing this is the right decision.

“While they do that, I’ll inform the wardens at Weisshaupt what’s happened. Best they not get caught off guard.” Hawke offers. I nod in agreement.

“Thank you, your worship. We will not fail you.” The relief in the warden’s voice is evident.

“Good luck with your inquisition. Try not to start an exalted march on anything…and take care of Varric for me.” Hawke quips with a small smile as she turns to leave. 

As everyone is milling around and most have left the main hall. I sit down tiredly realizing that I did have some injuries somehow I didn’t even notice but now my ribs are screaming at me. I hear the sound of glasses clinking as someone walks toward me. “I was relieved when I got word that you were alright, Ally” Gaspard says sitting beside me. He pours some liquor into the glasses and hands me one which I accept gratefully. “I was quite worried when saw you fall and suddenly disappear. What happened?” He asks concern evident on his face. 

“To stop from plummeting to certain death I opened a rift and we fell in,” I explain trying not to chuckle at the irony as I knew it would hurt. I take a sip of the burning alcohol waiting for his reaction.

“You went into the fade? Physically?” He says astonished. 

“Twice now,” I correct with a smirk. “And this time I took my entire group along with Stroud and Hawke.”

“Well maybe next time I should join you,” Gaspard quips. I chuckle and then grimace at the shooting pain in my ribs.

This doesn’t get by Gaspard. “You’re hurt and drained. You should see a healer,” he decides standing up. Before I can even reply he has set his glass down and gently picks me up trying not to hurt me any worse. He seems to be able to carry me quite easily as if I weight nothing.

“You know, I am perfectly capable of walking,” I chide lightly taking another large gulp of the alcohol from the glass still in my hand.

“Just allow me this,” he says giving me an intense look. I nod at him too exhausted to argue.  
 


	20. Recovering

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dorian and Gaspard visit with izzy as she recovers from her injuries....

Once with the healer, I’m given a sleeping draught and remember little else. I awake the later at the makeshift camp to find both Gaspard and Dorian sleeping in chairs within the tent. They both look exhausted. I look over at the stand beside the bed and find that someone had thoughtfully place a glass of water there. I reach over and gratefully pick it up taking a long drink. I am parched. Setting the glass down I move experimentally and I’m definitely sore but healed probably Solas’ work I note. The rustling seems to awaken both men. 

“It’s good you are awake, little Amatus,” Dorian says with a small smile. “Why didn’t you tell anyone you were injured?” He accuses in the same breath.  
Gaspard looks at Dorian and back at me. “I will go and get something for us all to eat; it seems the two of you need a moment.” Gaspard says wisely letting himself through the flap of the tent. 

“Are you okay, Falon?” I ask concerned.

“When we fell into the chasm, into the fade…I thought we were done for. I don’t know if I can forgive you for that moment.” He says in hurt voice.

“I’m sorry you had to go through it with me.” I say sadly.

“You misunderstand, I’m not sorry I was there with you. I thought I’d lost you!” He says angrily.

I look at him curiously not quite understanding. “You sent me ahead and then didn’t follow! For just a moment, I was certain you wouldn’t!” He says emphatically. “I thought this is it, this is where I finally lose her forever.”

Realization hits me; he’s upset because while he went back through the rift I stayed behind with Hawke and Stroud.

“Are you…are you alright?” He asks concerned.

“I learned a surprising amount. What happened at the temple of sacred ashes, for one.” I answer calmly.

“Regained your memory, that’s good then?” He gives me a small smile.

“I think so.” I say returning the smile. “Although, Hawke and Stroud made me decide who would stay behind.” I add sadly.

“So that is what took you so long,” He sighs, “I don’t envy you that decision. You do realize that this feat hasn’t been performed in over a thousand years? Corypheus and his allies entered the fade and began the blights, in comparison…”

“At least you were at my side…” I say giving him a smile. 

He chuckles lightly. “No offense, but I almost rather I hadn’t been.”

“No sense of adventure,” I tease, “that’s surprising, after all we did go into the future together as well.”

“I’ve not your talent for survival,” He says looking at the mark on my hand, “and not everyone is as discerning as I.”

“Yes, I’m sure Solas and Vivienne will be absolutely green with envy about the whole situation,” I jest lightly. “So should I be happy I accomplished something so grand?”

“Concerned, more like,” Dorian says with a serious look, “If you can physically go into the fade at will others will try to follow. Who knows what secrets Corypheus as revealed? Not all of them will be as lucky as you. What they could unleash…My advice? Let them speculate. Too many of them will see this as a challenge.”

“You don’t number among them? You aren’t at least a bit curious?” I ask him pointedly.

“I would be lying if I said it wasn’t tempting…but I’m no fool.” He decides. “There are enough idiots in the world that think if they just use enough blood magic their problems will vanish. It’s exactly the type of thing I want to stop back home. This…this I don’t need.”

“However,” He continues after a moment. “What I do need is a copy of the Liberalum. I wager I can find Corypheus’ real name. If I can prove he was grasping ankle biter with no family to speak of? The luster would come right off.”

“When we get back to Skyhold, I’ll see what I can do.” I say grinning at him. He seems to be back to his old self and that makes me happy. Although, I have to admit that I’m really concerned about Iron Bull. “Perhaps you should check on Bull, he didn’t take being in the fade as well as you or I.” I offer concerned.

“That is true,” Dorian agrees rising from the chair. “To be honest when I found out you were injured I didn’t think of it.”

Gaspard opens the tent flap and steps through seeing Dorian walking toward the opening he says, “I’ve brought food for three if you wish to stay Dorian.” 

“Thank you, your grace but I need to check on my… other friend.” Dorian says graciously. “Do make sure she eats, I believe the mark takes too much out of her.”   
He lifts the flap and leaves the tent. Gaspard brings in the tray and sets it on the table. I note that the healer had redressed me in a human sized sleeping tunic. 

It’s modest enough I guess as it sit up a bit higher and throw off the heavy coverlet, I try to twist to arrange the pillows for support and groan as pain shoots through my side. Gaspard quickly comes to help me set the pillow appropriately.

“You know I was quite worried when the healer said you broke 3 ribs and came very close to puncturing a lung.” He says with concern.

“The funny thing is I didn’t feel a thing until after, adrenaline, I guess,” I say with a small smile looking down at the green curving vine tattoos that seems to grow up my legs.

“After they gave you the sleeping draught you slept so long, they got worried.” He says obviously trying not to be overly concerned.

“In the fade time is different,” I explain, “it was only minutes here but hours there and we were hiking and fighting the entire time. I’m sure the others were really tired as well. How long was I out?”

“Three days.” He says the worry leaving his face. “But that explains why you slept so long. You had vanished and you were gone for about 2 hours of our time. Then they gave you strong sleeping draught”

“3 days?!” I repeat amazed. “Fen Harel’s balls! I was tired!”

Gaspard grins at the expletive. “Eat,” He commands setting a plate in front of me. “I agree with Dorian on this one.”

“Well, I wouldn’t want to gain too much weight for the emperor to carry me when I’m injured,” I tease biting into some cheese.

“I don’t think you are in any danger of that, my dear,” Gaspard says looking at my legs appreciatively as he sits in the chair by the bed and helps himself to the tray.

“You stayed with me the whole time?” I ask curiously.

“I did…as did your friend. He even slept here when he couldn’t hold his eyes open any longer.” Gaspard says taking a sip of port. “If you don’t think me too forward…how close are you and Dorian? It almost seems as if the two of you are…”

I blush at the thought but then I can’t help but to tease Gaspard a bit. “Dorian and I are close it’s true. We have helped each other through the hardest times of our lives. He’s even stayed in my room for a few nights.” I add just to see his reaction.

“I see,” Gaspard says slowly his face falling just a bit before he schools it. “If I’m getting in the way just let me know. I don’t wish to step on anyone’s toes”  
I try to stifle a snicker but fail horribly. Gaspard looks at me curiously. I finally laugh outright grimacing and holding my side as do so.

“Gaspard you are not getting in the way of anything. Dorian prefers the company of men. You would have a better chance with him in that way, than I ever would.” I say unable to keep the grin from my face. “He was a comfort to me when my clan died and I was comfort to him…with his family issues.”

I watch with a wicked grin as understanding crosses his features. 

“So he and the Qunari?” He asks curiously.

“Yes,” I nod still smirking.

“You were testing me?” he growls somewhat aggressively.

“Gaspard, you are not the first person to think that, everyone at Skyhold thought as much at one time or another. We just let them think it. I have to admit it was fun watching Mother Giselle get her knickers in a wad, because he’s Tevinter.” I say almost going into a series of giggles again. “Besides he enjoys scandalizing the nobility as much as you and I do.”

“You don’t think much of the chantry do you?” Gaspard asks curiously.

“I’m Dalish, so I believe in our gods but only a fool could be blind to the effect the chantry has on the people. I never declared myself as Andrastian or the Herald. In fact any self-respecting Dalish elf would be put off at such titles. However, the people need something to believe in so I choose to let them believe instead of terrorizing them or openly spouting my own beliefs. They need to believe the maker sent a Dalish mage for a reason.”

“That’s remarkably pragmatic and compassionate of you,” Gaspard says slightly astonished. 

I shrug lightly. “I do what I believe is right, I have no right to tell people what to believe.”

We sit and eat for a few moments in silence. As I set my plate back on the table, Gaspard gets a cunning look on his face. “You know I don’t take kindly to being tricked,” He says seriously.

“Oh?” I ask curiously.

“I think I may forgive you for tricking me into thinking you were with Dorian,” He says with a smirk, “but there will be a price.”

I look at him puzzled as he rises from the chair.

“I have to admit, I was worried about competition, you and Dorian being so close. Dancing so scandalously at the Winter Palace, testing me in this very room.” He says lightly, belying his body language which is almost predatory as he sits on the edge of the bed. “You know this is the first time we have ever been alone.”  
I am very aware of the situation and feel very exposed and vulnerable as he sits so close to me. I can feel the heat radiating off him.

Not knowing exactly how to react I make a joke, “So what is this price you mentioned?” 

Before I can think, he cups my head in his hands and kisses me, not in the way he did at the winter palace. This is more primal, hungry. I am a bit stunned at first but relax into it and kiss him in return. He pulls away gently biting my bottom lip before capturing my lips again and demanding entrance. I comply with the unspoken request as heat pools in my stomach making the butterflies I was feeling turn into something else. Feeling braver I slip my tongue out and taste his upper lip then drawing his lower lip into my mouth, I gently grazing my teeth on it. He reacts with a famished groan and reaches up to ghost his fingers over the tips of my ear causing me to shiver. He pulls away running his thumb over my bottom lip. 

“That was the price,” he says softly.

"A price I don't mind paying," I reply roguishly as I pull him back to me ignoring the ache in my side and kiss him again. He responds greedily taking control, capturing my lips. I respond by challenging him for control which causes him to smile against my mouth before pulling away a second time. 

"I believe you have repaid the price two-fold, my dear. Perhaps we should wait to investigate further when you are fully healed. I know you have other things to attend to." He says as he rises to leave.

I am slightly disappointed but I know he's right. I still have Corypheus to deal with and suitors to be rid of. I smile inwardly knowing that I will no longer wonder what it might be like to kiss him.


	21. Checkmate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a chess tourney at Skyhold and assassination attempt on Izzy

As we have the Inquisition preparing for the arbor wilds, the advisors have decided to have a chess tourney to increase morale. There are amazing amount of players here at Skyhold within the inner circle alone Dorian, Cullen, Bull and Solas all play. Being Dalish I never tried the game until Dorian taught me. He said I picked up on it quick as I’m a good strategizer. In casual games I have already beaten everyone in the inner circle except Solas who is an exceptional player. As I look at the board to see who is playing in the tourney I am surprised to see Ser Michael has entered. Then I am doubly surprised to see Emperor Gaspard’s name along with the other 2 suitors that I had planned meeting with. I had no idea the Emperor would bother with such a mundane thing or that he was even in the area, as I was to meet with him after we went to the temple. The other 2 suitors are good and noble men and I like them but not the same as I like Dorian or Gaspard. I note that I will have to let them down gently as they are honorable men.

Everyone gathers to watch the tourney and the first matches are called. Cole comes to stand beside me. “He cares for you the way you care for him…he just doesn’t….know yet. He’s confused because it’s…different.” Cole says cryptically. I am now used to Cole’s ramblings so I know better than to press. “Someone is in pain,” He says just a suddenly. “I need to help them.” With that Cole disappears and I’m left wondering who he was referring to.

I shrug it off and concentrate on the tourney winning my first few games fairly easily. As we take a break for people to eat and drink. I’m a bit nervous with all the suitors here but Cole appears again. “Don’t be nervous,” he says “It will all work out no one will be angry with you.” I look at him with relief evident on my face. I sit on a bench with my compassion spirit friend enjoying his frank companionship. “What do you feel from Gaspard? I ask.

“I like him he tries to do the right thing…like Cullen.” Cole explains, “even though sometimes it’s really hard for him. Things weight heavily on him…it makes him sad sometimes. You make him feel lighter…happier. He liked it when you kissed him.” 

I blush hotly at his words. “That’s enough Cole, but thank you.”

Thankfully my next game is called before he can say anything else. Seems Iron Bull and I are going to play, Dorian against Gaspard, Ser Michael against Solas, and Cullen against Lord Abernache (who knew he loved chess). This should be an interesting battle of minds I think looking at the players as I sit at the appropriate table.

“Hey Boss,” Bull says grinning, “It’s just you and me.” 

I admit I’m still concerned about Bull he made me hit him with a stick after Adamant. “Are you okay now Bull?” I ask trying to not to be too concerned as I know he might find it a bit too much.

“Yea Boss, that training exercise always helps,” he says understanding the giving me a softer smile than his usual wicked grin. 

“Maybe someday you can explain it to me,” I say quizzically as I am genuinely curious as to how that helps.

“Yea I knew you were curious about that, someday but not today,” he grins wickedly.

“I’m more interested about what happened between you a Gaspard.” He says lowering his voice as he makes his first move. I blush but realize this might be his way of throwing me off my game. I focus on the game and make my move before answering. “What makes you think anything happened?” I ask curiously.

“You haven’t stopped smiling since he visited with you at Adamant and I’m not the only one who noticed.” he says nodding towards Dorian. “If it makes you feel any better I think you could do much worse than Gaspard. The man obviously cares about you. Who else would send a battalion of chevaliers to help out?” He makes his move and sits back.

“You don’t think he did that solely because we were fighting in Orlais?” I ask moving my piece in calculated move to tempt him.

“I know when a man is trying to show a woman he cares about her.” Bull says firmly as he strategizes his next move. “Gaspard did it the only way he could without being too forward about it or trying to undermine your authority. He wanted to try to make you safer in the situation but he wanted to also give you control. It also shows that he believes in you.” He moves his piece taking the bait.

“Well that’s…good to know,” I say moving my queen into checkmate. 

Bull studies the board. “Well damn, Boss, Dorian said you were good but you have just blown me away I didn’t see that Tamassran coming.” 

“Too busy Ben Hassrathing?” I tease but look at him intensely. I know he just threw the game but I wonder why. “Later?” I ask brightly. He nods in understanding.

“Later can be now,” he says quietly looking up at the battlement above us. I nod in understanding and head inside making an excuse about needing the privy. I wait for minute or two as Bull comes up the battlement. We can watch the tourney but speak privately.

“What’s going on?” I ask curiously. “Your suitors,” Bull explains, “I believe one has been threatened or possibly compromised by the Venatori. He has changed in demeanor much in the way I would note the native of Seheron would when they were being forced to betray us.”

Remembering the story of the restaurant man, I nod understanding. “Ok Bull this is your area of expertise, who is it? And how do you want to handle it? If we have to call a war table meeting it may alert whoever is pulling the strings.”

“Duke Cyril de Montfort, I agree we need to keep this quiet we cannot alert everyone.” Bull says sensibly 

“Leliana should be notified as she can do quite bit without making it obvious.” I think quickly, “Cole can keep people from seeing him I can have him stay with me. They have probably come up with some way to get my bodyguard away from me. Since you threw the game you can alert Leliana. I’ll find Cole. We also need to find out if he allied with the Venatori willingly there may be extenuating circumstances.”

“Okay Boss,” Bull agrees, “It sounds like a plan.” 

I slip out of the battlements and find Cole, who agrees to stay with me unseen until the danger is passed. In the next round I am playing Solas and Gaspard is playing Cullen. Solas says very little during match as he is a rather serious player of the game. I try to just focus on the game as I know anything that is going to happen will take place during my time with the suitor. I had yet to beat Solas in our matches previously so I stay attentive to the game. It is hard fought but I finally whittle his pieces down as he takes quite a few of mine and somehow I manage a checkmate. Solas smiles at me. “You have been practicing. Well won, Lethallan.”

I look over to see that Gaspard is about ready to beat Cullen. Looking at the pieces, Cullen has gone back to using a technique that he’s comfortable with but most of us have figured out. Looking at the board, I can tell Gaspard had seen it used before as well. Pretty soon Gaspard and I are seated across from each other in Chess combat. 

“Fancy seeing you here, Emperor,” I tease lightly as I make my first move.

Gaspard smiles as he studies the board trying to figure out my strategy. “I just learned of Chess Tourney and as a lover of the game, I decided to throw my hat in.” He says roguishly as he moves his piece.

“Oh, so it’s just coincidence I’m meeting with the other suitors after the tourney?” I quip grinning as I move my piece.

His face gets serious. “Allana, why did your Qunari throw the game?” He asks in low concerned voice while moving his piece.

“What makes you think he did?” I ask lightly in low voice.

A hardened mask comes over Gaspard’s face. “I’m no fool. A man like that takes pride in his game and let it go too easily.” He hisses in almost a whisper as he emphatically moves the next piece.

“I can’t say anything about it at this point, Emperor. Doing so could put our operation at risk,” I explain quietly. As I pretend I’m studying the board before I move my next piece. 

“I trust you will be careful,” Gaspard says slowly moving his next piece.

“Yes, I will. Let’s concentrate on the game shall we?” I offer lightly giving him a smile.

“As you wish, Inquisitor.” He says shortly. I can tell he is upset but understands that some things need to be kept quiet as we are in a public place. He really does care. It’s a strange feeling because I know Dorian cares about me but not in the same way. My mind is not on the game at this point and I am making automatic decisions barely looking at the board. By the time I bring my attention back to the game it is clear Gaspard is going to win. I have the king, queen and one knight left. He has a few pawns, a rook, 2 knights, and his king and queen. He takes my queen easily. 

As we get up to leave the table and Gaspard is declared the winner. “Congratulations Emperor, and thank you,” I announce gracefully. He smiles but it doesn’t reach his eyes that are filled with concern.

I am first due to meet with Arl Teagan Guerrin. A lovely man, it is rumored he had an affair with the warden who died fighting the archdemon. I like him as a friend and enjoy spending time with him. As meet with him I tell him as much and he takes it gracefully. And although I can tell the sweet man is disappointed he is poised. He thanks the inquisition for their help in dealing with the tevinter mages that had thrown him out of his home and takes his leave to spend time with his nephew Connor. At least that went smoothly Bull settles back in his spot in the now deserted garden gazebo as I await the next suitor. Josephine comes bursting in with some information about the Chargers it seems Bull is needed immediately. Bull nods at me knowingly as he takes his leave and Cullen is brought in to replace him as my chaperon.

Cullen settles in the customary spot where Iron Bull would sit and I ask Josephine to give us a few minutes before bringing Duke Cyril de Montfort. I quickly make Cullen aware of the situation quietly letting him know Cole was around as well. We settle into our respective seats and just barely manage to finish our conversation before the Duke is brought in.

“Duke Cyril, so lovely to see you again,” I say brightly smiling at the man. 

He smiles in return looking slightly nervous as he sits down next to me on the settee. “You look beautiful as always Inquisitor.”

“Thank you, Duke” I say charmingly, “You are probably wondering why I asked you to Skyhold. I have made my decision.” 

“Before you make your decision, I have something to say.” The man says with forced bravery as he reaches for my hand. 

“And I you,” I say leaning toward him.

“I’m sorry,” He whispers in my ear as pulls a dagger and attempts to stab me. The man is nervous so he only manages to graze my ribs before Cole has him immobilized with a dagger to his throat as Cullen races over to bind the man’s hands.

I hear chaos above me on the battlements and Leliana pokes her head over the battlements and grins as us. “All good up here Inquisitor.”

“My turn now…” I say sweetly looking at the Duke, “What do they have on you?”

The man turns white and looks as if he’s going to faint. “My mother,” He mumbles, “they took my mother. You knew?” 

I nod, “I have spies as well, Duke.” I look at Cullen and sigh as Leliana enters the garden, “We need to find Lady de Montfort, hold the Duke until we can verify his story.”

“I’m so sorry,” The Duke says with regret.

“I know,” I tell the frightened man. “But I’m sure you will understand that you are out of the running…”

“Of course, your worship,” He says hanging his head as he is lead away. 

“I think we are done here.” I say walking away.

“Inquisitor, are you alright?” Cullen says gesturing to my wound.

“Yes it’s just a surface wound,” I explain, “the poor man was too nervous to do any damage.”

As I head to main hall I am stopped by a frantic Dorian. “I heard there was an incident! What happened?” He notices me holding my vest coat protectively over my body. “Fasta vass! You’re hurt!!!”

“Keep it down, Dorian we don’t want to alert everyone.” I say calmly and quietly. “One of the suitors was coerced into an assassination attempt. I’m fine. It’s all been taken care of. I need you check in with Bull and the Chargers to make sure their alright. Please? He may need help and can explain everything and what he can’t explain I will later.” I say giving him a quick one armed hug. I am worried about Iron Bull but I can’t be walking through the keep like this it will scare the visiting dignitaries and I do need to take care of the wound.

Dorian gives me a hard look. 

“Please, Dorian! I need to know they weren’t attacked too.” I plead.

“Alright,” He says grudgingly, “but I want to know what in the void is going on here.” 

“I would like to know the same,” Gaspard says firmly walking up to us.

I take a deep breathe, “Fine, Emperor if you will come with me. Dorian as soon as you know they are alright please let me know.”

I know it’s improper to take the Emperor to my private rooms but he and I need to have a chat anyway. I can hear the tittering of the nobles as we walk to the door of my suite. As we walk through the door and shuts behind us. Before I can start up the steps I am spun around by the arm. I hiss as the wound opens a bit wider due to the forced turning.

“Can you please explain what is going…Oh Maker,” Gaspard says looking at me and noticing the wound I had been covering with my vest coat. “You’re wounded, I’m sorry.” With that he picks me up and carries me up the steps to my suite.

He sits me on the settee. “What do you need me to do?” he asks in a brisk manner. 

“There is a pitcher and bowl with a cloth over there,” I say gesturing to the screened dressing area. “If you would bring a bowl of water, the elfroot tincture, and a cloth that would be most helpful, I need to see it before I can heal it,” I say as strip off the vest coat.

He walks over and retrieves the items bringing them to me. I realize that I’m going to have to take off the waistcoat and undershirt to get the wound. I try not to blush too hard as I do so. Gaspard must have noticed my discomfiture so he faces away from me respectfully as I divest myself of the clothing.

“What happened?” He asks in a calmer voice.

“It seems the Venatori had coerced Duke de Montfort into trying to assassinate me. He was reluctant so they took his mother. He tried to go through with it but was too nervous. Cullen and Cole stopped him before he could do any real damage. They also sent a few assassins to see it through but Leliana took care of them.” I explain quickly as I clean the wound.

“But where was The Iron Bull?” He asks curiously.

“The Iron Bull was called away probably a ploy on the part of the Venatori to make sure he wasn’t around, but what they don’t realize is that my large menacing friend is also a spy. He caught onto the assassination attempt and reads body language well enough to know what the Duke was doing and that the Duke was not doing this of his own volition.” I quickly explain. “Now you see why we didn’t alert everyone. We couldn’t have anyone thinking we knew anything.”

“Clever, except the part where you got hurt.” Gaspard says lightly.

“I’ll be fine.” I say focusing on the wound and knitting the skin back together.   
“What are you doing?” Gaspard asks turning his head as the green glow I’m accustomed to when healing brightens around me. I say nothing as I am focused on healing myself and he just watches. I finally look up at him when I’m finished.

“That was amazing there isn’t even a scar,” He says with a look of surprise on his face. “I’ve seen mages heal before but that was different.”

I can’t help blushing a bit because I’m sitting in front of him topless. “Part of my charm I guess, the new skin will be a bit tender for a few days but I will be fine.” I tease as I stand and quickly walk to my closet. I pull out a tunic, pulling it over my head, before going back to the discarded clothing. “Too bad about the tunic, it was one of my favorites.”

“I’ll get you another,” He teases regaining some of his composure. 

“However this does leave us in a strange position,” I begin trying to collect my thoughts.

“Oh, with the nobles and you inviting the emperor of Orlais to you bedchamber?” He asks curiously.

“To the void with the nobles!” I stop myself and chuckle. “Fen Harel’s ass, that’s not what I meant. I think I’ve been spending too much time with Sera.”

He looks at me curiously.

“The only suitor I have left is you.” I manage to say evenly as I pour 2 glasses of wine from the decanter on the table beside the settee. I turn around to hand him one and he has moved so close, I almost spill the wine on him. 

“Is that so?” He asks huskily as he takes the proffered wineglass from me.

“It seems to be that way,” I say slightly breathless at his proximity. 

“So if I were to keep courting you that would be agreeable?” He asks.

“Would you want to?” I ask in reply. I lower my face because I can’t look at him.

“I would,” he says firmly as he sets the glass down. 

I look up quickly because I didn’t expect that answer. I am still a Dalish elf and mage after all. “You would? Gaspard the scandal alone…”

He doesn’t give me chance to finish as he captures my lips in a searing kiss. I melt into him almost immediately, returning the kiss with equal fervor. When he finally pulls away for some much needed air.

I gasp “but…”

“I don’t care,” he says firmly interrupting, before kissing me thoroughly again.

“Ally!” Dorian barges into the room. 

Gaspard and I both jump away from each other at the interruption. Dorian picks up on situation quickly. His face goes through many emotions as he seems to be deciding how to proceed. He schools his face into an emotionless mask. 

“I wanted to let you know as soon as possible that Bull and Chargers are fine.” He explains. “The Venatori attacked the Chargers while they were scouting out for survivors at Haven. There were a few minor injuries but that is all. I am meeting Bull at The Herald’s Rest. He said he wants to speak with you.”

I breathe a sigh of relief as I walk over to Dorian and give him a hug. “Thank you, Dorian; I appreciate you letting me know as soon as possible. Tell Bull I will be there shortly.” I say ignoring the unease in the room. 

“As you wish, Allana, Emperor.” He says with a nod of his head before stiffly turning around and leaving the room.

I turn back to Gaspard. “Thank Mythal they are all ok,” I breathe in relief.

“Is he alright?” Gaspard asks curiously. 

“I think he will be fine now that he knows what happened and Bull is safe.” I say thoughtfully. “He must have been quite upset we didn’t tell him.”

“You should go speak to The Iron Bull; I can join you later at The Herald’s Rest if you like. I have a few reports to go over but I would enjoy a night hanging out in a tavern again as Emperor, I don’t get to do such mundane things very often.” Gaspard says smiling.

“Very well,” I reply walking over to give him gentle kiss. “I’ll see you later. But I will warn you don’t play wicked grace against Josephine or you may be walking back to your room with just a bucket for your bits.”

“I consider myself warned,” Gaspard teases.


	22. The Green-Eyed Monster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dorian argues with Izzy....

I step into The Herald’s Rest after freshening up and see Bull and Dorian quietly talking at their regular table. “Mind if I join you?” I ask as I saunter over.

“Yea Boss, are you okay? I heard you were wounded.” Bull asks with a concerned look.

“I’m fine it was just surface wound.” I say lifting my tunic slightly. “See not even a scar. I think they were too afraid to give the poor man a poisoned dagger because he probably would have cut himself he was so nervous. Leliana took care of any stragglers. Are the chargers ok?”

“The venatori set up an ambush as their ploy to get me away from you. But I was able to get a messenger bird to them in time.” Bull explains. “So they were ready for them. They had situation well in hand by the time I got there. Only minor injuries, Stitches already has them fixed up.”

“That’s good,” I say smiling as I turn my gaze to Dorian who has been unusually quiet. “Did Bull explain everything?” I ask him brightly. 

“Yes, though you both could have told me what was going on,” Dorian pouts.

“You weren’t around after your match, there wasn’t time and we only told those we needed to at the time. We couldn’t jeopardize the situation.” Iron Bull says tiredly. “I’ve already apologized.”

“Well you still should have told me,” Dorian maintains stubbornly.

“You talk him,” Bull grumbles getting up, “I’m getting more drinks.”

As soon as Bull leaves the table Dorian hisses “What in Thedas were you thinking kissing the emperor?” 

I look at him confused. “Why are you worried about it?”

“Because aside from you right now he is most powerful person in Thedas….and you…are the Inquisitor…it’s not right.” He says heatedly.

I am too astonished to even get angry. ”Dorian, what is this all about?”

“I don’t know…it’s just wrong …you’re acting like a two-bit hussy drooling all over the emperor.” He says scathingly. “He’s just higher noble who will use you and then toss you aside. You’re an elf and a mage what are you thinking?”

I blush hotly at the accusation and then I find myself angry. “You’re out of line, Dorian! I think I will take my leave now. I think you need some time to think over the horrible things you just said to me.” I say standing up so quickly, I almost knock the table over. I walk past Bull who is returning with our drinks and head up the two flights of steps out ignoring everyone until I’m out on the battlements alone.

Then Cole appears, “He didn’t really mean it…”

“Thanks Cole, but if that is how he feels, he needs to tell me himself and I think I need to be alone for a bit,” I say trying to keep the irritation from my voice. 

“I understand…” Cole says and with that he vanishes and I am alone again.

What is Dorian’s problem? Is he afraid I will stop being his friend? I don’t understand. I sit down leaning against the battlement wall going over it in my head. Does he not like Gaspard? What is so wrong with him courting me? So what if I’m an elf and a mage that doesn’t seem to bother Gaspard why should it bother Dorian? Then my self-righteousness kicks in. What business is it of his anyway? What in the void? I never butted in between him and Bull. Although I spent months having my own heart break knowing they were together. I find some happiness in the middle of this Corypheus mess and I’m doing something wrong? My musing is interrupted by a familiar voice.

“Allana, I was told there was a…disagreement. Are you ok?” Gaspard asks. I turn around to face him painting a smile on my face that isn’t quite fake as I regard him, while he approaches. 

“I brought a bottle of wine, Antivan. I am told it is your favorite,” He says smiling as he sits down next to me on the cold stone. 

“You were informed correctly,” I tease lightly. “As for the…disagreement you were also informed correctly," my voice drops sadly, "Dorian does not approve of you courting me but I don’t understand why.”

“I can understand why his disapproval might hurt you,” He says concerned, as he opens the wine. “He is your best friend after all.”

“He is. Which is why I’m so confused about this sudden attitude. I would think he would be happy for me.” I say thoughtfully, taking the proffered bottle. I take a drink and hand it back to him.

“I’m sorry, Ally is there anything I can do?” he asks taking a swig of the wine and handing the bottle back to me.

“I don’t know, I don’t understand at all maybe once we both calm down and can talk again we resolve this. So for now…no…but this…you coming here and talking with me…it helps.” I say smiling at him genuinely as I take a drink of the wine and shiver as the night has gotten chilly.

“Do you want to go back to the tavern?” Gaspard asks concerned as he removes his coat setting it over my shoulders. I smile gratefully and snuggle into the warmth.

“No, I don’t want to deal with it tonight. I think he needs time to think on it. However I know where we can go, because you are going to get cold too if we stay out here too long. Follow me.” I reply rising to stand.

“Where are we going?” Gaspard asks curiously.

“Skyhold is very ancient and has hidden passageways. I think you may find this interesting.” I answer smiling.

“Well then, lead the way,” he teases lightly grabbing the bottle of wine to follow.

We make our way across the battlements and into the garden which is thankfully deserted now. Entering one of the doors, that seems to open to an empty room. I immediately head toward the left wall and press on the panel. The panel slides away to reveal passageway. After lighting a veilfire torch, I take the passage to the forgotten library near the kitchens.

Gaspard’s smile widens as we enter the library. I light a few veilfire torches for light within the room. “These books must be ancient!” he says excitedly as he gently dusts off a few to look at the titles.

I grin at him picking up a book I had been reading. “I thought you might find it intriguing.”

“A copy of the Shartan verses of the chant…the chantry says this book never existed. This library probably has the only copy in existence.” He says with astonishment gently brushing the dust off the binding of the book.

“The chantry says a lot of things and they got much wrong or choose to hide it, that’s why I kept this place a secret. I would hate to see these tomes destroyed. We could learn much of what was lost.” I say smiling at him.

“You are right to, no one will hear about this from me.” Gaspard says happily.

We read passages from different books to each other and finish the wine. 

“Shall we stay?” I ask looking at empty bottle, “or shall go somewhere else?”

“Where else can we go?” he asks.

I grin at him knowingly. “Wait here for a moment and I will be right back.” I quickly race to kitchens. It is late no one is around even the cat is curled up by the hearth. I make a quick plate of cheeses and fruit, making a quick stop at the wine cellar on the way back to the library.

“You grabbed more wine and food?” Gaspard asks curiously as I return.

“I thought we could take a few of the books and read them someplace less dusty and more comfortable. I also missed dinner…if you can carry the a few books and the plate, I’ll carry the wine and the torch.” I reply smiling.

“Lead the way,” Gaspard replies.

I walk over to an unlit torch and turn it. This causes the one of the bookcases to slide back revealing another passageway. 

“Amazing! How did you find this?” he asks curiously.

“Well when I was with the clan we were always exploring ancient eleven ruins, Skyhold was built on top of ancient elf ruins the builders didn’t tear anything down just kept building using the ruins as a base. So I noticed the signs of passageways because I knew what to look for.” I explain with a chuckle in my voice. “A few people know about some of them but I only know all of them.”

“Very smart of you in case of attack,” Gaspard says in agreement. We get to the dead end at of the passageway and I push on a stone on the wall and the front wall slides away. I step through followed by Gaspard. 

“We are in a closet?” He asks curiously as carefully steps through holding books and plate.

“Not just any closet,” I say cheekily as I open the door, “my closet.” I step out into my quarters and extinguish the veilfire. 

Gaspard blinks at the sudden brightness of the room. “Very clever, it’s always good to have an escape route.”

“Especially with Vivienne and Josephine trying to make me wear frilly Orlesian dresses and Mythal forbid… corsets.” I joke as I cross the room to open the wine and fill glasses

“They wouldn’t dare!” He says facetiously trying to be serious but failing as his grin indicates. He brings the plate over to the table as well setting it down before taking a seat on the settee.

“Oh they try, but I won’t have it.” I reply wryly, as I hand him a glass.

“I don’t think you need such trappings, you are beautiful as you are.” Gaspard states catching my hand and pulling me gently down to sit on his lap.

I blush lightly at the compliment but alcohol gives me a bit more bravery. “Why Emperor,” I tease, “Are you flirting with me?”

“And what if am?” He says brazenly. “You blush so prettily like a maiden I can’t help it.”

I think about his comment for a moment. “Would that be an issue for you?” I ask seriously. “The Dalish bond for life we don’t have dalliances.”

“You mean?” he asks curiously. I nod. He is silent for a few seconds as if collecting his thoughts. “It’s not an issue…I just didn’t expect…I mean you’ve been around humans for so long I thought…” he stops tightening his arms around my waist possessively. “It doesn’t matter what I thought…It’s not an issue. If anything I’m very lucky to be your only suitor.” He says giving me an affectionate kiss on the forehead.

“Good, because I would like you to kiss me the way you did earlier, without an interruption,” I manage say blushing deeply.

“There is nothing I would rather do, than comply with that request,” he says leaning to gently brush his lips against mine. I melt into the kiss immediately. As we finally pull away for air, Gaspard says “Allana, as enticing as you are, I must leave I will not disgrace you in this way. We have both had much to drink tonight.”

I look at him disappointed but I realize he is being chivalrous. “I know and I understand, the main hall should be empty this late. You should be able to get back to your quarters unseen. I will see you off in the morning.” I stand up and so he can stand as well

“Thank you for an intriguing evening, my dear,” He says giving me a hug and chaste kiss, before he takes his leave. After he leaves I sigh and sit down on the settee mindlessly eating from the plate I brought up while going over the evening. It has been a whirlwind of hurt, anger and joy.


	23. Strange Magic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dorian comes to talk to izzy about his behavior chaos ensues...

I am awakened by Dorian bursting into my quarters. “Ally, I need to talk to you!” he demands as he hits the top of the steps. I groan and reach up to touch my aching head. I did have way too much wine last night. Gaspard was right about that.

He stops short when he sees me. “Why are you sleeping on the settee?”

“I had a bit too much wine.” I admit still holding my aching head, “I must have fallen asleep here.”

“Tea, then talk,” He decides walking over to the table with the drinking water pitcher in it. He mixes some elfroot and few other herbs and heats the tea. Bringing it back over to me he stops when he sees the two wine glasses and bottles of wine. “So you weren’t alone.” He says slowly handing me the medicinal tea.

“No, after our argument I went to the battlements for some air. Gaspard came to check on me.” I reply.

“Of course he did,” Dorian sneers.

“We spent some time together reading and drinking wine. Then he left.” I explain ignoring his attitude as I gesture to the books.

“Is that what they are calling it now?” he accuses. “You’re sleeping with Emperor of Orlais; do you really think he will stay with you when all of this is over?”

I gulp down the hot tea quickly and summon a bit of healing energy to work with the tea before I answer. I am tired of being nice and my head is pounding so I just let loose. “I haven’t slept with anyone ever, not that it’s any of your business Dorian.” I retort hotly. “I never once got in the way of your affairs why do you care so bloody much?” I stand up making my way to closet with the intent on pulling out some fresh clothing.

“Would you prefer I didn’t care about your welfare at all?” He quips nastily.

“I would prefer you tell me why you’re acting this way.” I reply angrily.

Before I can realize what is happening, Dorian spins me around pushes me against the closet door. “What do you think…?” I start to say but I’m interrupted by his mouth viciously taking mine. I am stunned. My brain refuses to…to think, as Dorian plunders my mouth mercilessly. As my mind comes back to me I realize that my body has responded to him. I am kissing him in hungrily in return. As I turn my face, air deprived, gasping for breath. I become conscious of his hands traveling over my body, his mouth on my neck and ear which causes me to shudder, and his leg pressing at my sensitive core. “Dorian!” I manage to say with a low guttural groan.

He runs a hand down my body reaching the apex between my legs and stops short as this seems to alarm him. Realization crosses his features and he pulls away. “Festis bei umo canavarum! Maker, I’m sorry, Little Amatus,” he says quickly heading for the steps.

“Dorian wait! We need to talk about this!” I call but he is gone.

I shake my head; shock would be understatement to describe what I’m feeling. What in the void just happened here? Why did Dorian react that way? Why did he kiss me? In a blur, I freshen up and get dressed, as I head down the steps to leave my quarters I realize I will have to deal with Dorian later. I had promised Gaspard I would see him off and have a sparring practice with Iron Bull. Fen harel’s ass!!! Iron Bull! Why would Dorian do that to him?! I focus my mind on what I need to do next deciding to deal with things as they come.

As I see Gaspard off, I push my other worries to the wayside. I am genuinely happy to see him. As he says goodbye to me he gives me chaste kiss on the cheek, asking me to be careful at the Temple of Mythal. He and his troops will meet me there he promises, as he mounts his horse and rides off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter before the story splits as I have done two endings, there is main ending Gaspard and the alternate ending Dorian. I will link them and name them as follows:  
> Emotionally in love (main ending) http://archiveofourown.org/works/6086917/chapters/13951774  
> Emotionally in love (alternate ending)http://archiveofourown.org/works/6087060/chapters/13952142


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